wired

well I'm anxious I can feel the nerves in my body on hte outside of my skin.This is way wierd! it started lastnight Bingoboy  and I talked  and he had alot to say. He loves me this is something that I know. But he's not sure. I don't pressure him. I let him find his own way. I told BB last year that I loved him. and It tok a huge weight of my shoulders. I knew that I had gone way pass the "like" stage and straight into Love. Herpes is keeping this relationship at bay. and the way he found out is another and I will not get into that on here.  I wish he can see pass this and enjoy me. I love him but it gets tiring hearing the same thing. I can see it in his eyes that way he looks at me.  any way the news of "feelings for me " had me up all night last and I couldn't sleep. then I got out of bed and was to excited about our convo. dancing @ 3 am  is crazy.(wrk @ 530) I got to work and atarted listening to Neyo and thought of my ex-H. and cried. ONE BIG BALL OF EMOTIONS!!! and as soon as the tears fell they dried . I was back to being happy about my talk w/BB. I felt ripped inside. by 1130 i was tired. and now I exhausted but the news and the elections is just another excuse to be jittery. Q1.what is BB decide that he wants a relationship? what does that entail? Q2. what if he decides that after a while he doesn't want to do it any more than what.? I would kill myself for real.( pay Attention)Q3. should I ask him this or wait until he gets his head out of his ASS?C4 Our relationship will be ok, but we would have alot of trust issues because of our pass.Q4. how would we work on that?CQ5. he needs a job BAD, how will that effect our new relationship if any?  And just as a P.S. He would definitly need a HELMET and GOGGLES. I had that dick and OMG OMG OMG I miss it so bad. Hell he may need full body amor. LOL (no im serious)throw his back into it and do the touchdown thing God knows that he can put it down when he wants to. And eating is good too but he had a broke tooth that got in the way. I haven't had any w/ the new teeth. and the way he is acting i wonder if I'llk ever get any more .