Why can't the Good Days last ?

If only the good days would last then there wouldn't be as much of an issue as far as whether, or not, him and I will work out as a couple. As it stands right now whenever I try to see the future with him by my side there's a thick bank of dense fog blocking my view. If I went only by his " sweet " words that he scatters here and there randomly, then I'd probably be sure of a future with him. Yet how can I trust his words ? So many times he's gone back on his promises to me. Each time he did it was like a knife being buried deep in my heart. The thing is that feeling that knife go through me so many times, I can't bring myself to willingly put myself in a position to allow him to do it all over again ! How can I ? And why should I ? 

If only he would go " out " somewhere more often. Then that would give me more time to myself... more peace and quiet to do what I need to do for myself. The catch to this would be the obvious factor that I would have NO IDEA where he would " really " be going ! OF course he would tell me where he was planning on going, but whether, or not, he would actually go there is an entirely different story !

A very good example of how he screws up my days when he's here... is right now...

Right now he's taking a nap in the bedroom, and he said that once he gets up he wants me to start cooking dinner then ! THEN !? It's already almost 7 pm, and he's still in the bedroom asleep. I'm supposed to just keep sitting around waiting on " his word " of when I'm supposed to start cooking dinner ! BULLSHIT !!!!!!!!!!! .... I told him that I was all ready to cook when he went into the bedroom to have a nap, but he INSISTED that I wait until he gets up from his nap to cook dinner ! UGH !!!!!!!!

So what if I wanted to have a nap for awhile ????.

There's NO WAY that's going to happen because as soon as I fell asleep I could guarantee you that he'd be getting up from his nap.... and he'd come over to me... waking me up... TELLING ME... to start cooking dinner !!!!!!!

IF he truly loved me, and cared about my well-being, then he would have asked me if I wanted to take a nap for awhile ! BUT OH NO.... he won't even take one moment to check on what I want ! OH NO ! ... 

It's always about Him !!!! 

EVERYTHING IS ALWAYS ABOUT HIM !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!