Why Am I Alive?

Earlier this week my "friend" who cuts herself told me that I couldn't yell at her for cutting because I cut myself for attention, do note that she came into class in booty shorts and short sleeves with cuts going up and down her thighs and wrists. Little did she or anyone know I'm still cutting. Everyone thinks that I am 3 months clean... only I know the truth about it, well aside from anyone who reads this, but none of you know my actual identity so in that way it remains a secret. I wish I could actually talk to people. I just feel like such a burden. Everyone says I am. Maybe the world would be better off if I just... disappeared.