What is wrong with me?
I know my dreams are crumbling. I know the most important non offspring person in the world is telling me her world would be better without my love. I know the loving, secure family unit I have worked 15 years on is being taken from my precious children. But why am I only wanting sympathy right now? I want people to tell me how horrible and unfair it is. I want someone to comfort me and tell me I'm really a great husband and father. Worst of all I want this from the one who is rejecting me and forcing these results.
What is wrong with me? Where is my fight?
What is wrong with me? Where is my fight?
Replies
So I asked my wife if she could drop off one of my sons at a school dance so I could attend my first Divorce Care meeting. She said that she thought that would be good for me and asked if I would be doing that instead of counseling. I responded truthfully that I wanted to do both as I honestly don\'t know what if anything will help me get through this. I can\'t even say the word divorce and she started talking about how it is going to be done quick and things will be better because she can\'t keep living like this. I felt like the words shattered my soul. Keep living like this? What with a husband that loves and cares for her and the kids? What the hell is wrong with me? I don\'t have any addictions. I\'m honest and loyal. I treat her the very best I can because I love her. I could be a better handyman though I keep busy and clean and cook on top of it all. I give her massages and love to take her out when we have the money. I know I\'m predictable and boring. I\'m quiet and not charming.
I cannot put into words how devastated I am. If I tried this hard for 15 years and she can\'t stand \"living this way\" no would be able to stand it. I have been blessed in this life, but I believe God does not intend a happy, secure, loving marriage to be one for me.
You sound like a perfect gentleman and if your wife doesn\'t see that then she doesn\'t deserve you. I know what it feels like to try so hard and put others needs before our own and they still be not happy. It sucks because they have everything in their hands and choose to leave the only good they have. Cheer up and know your worth. You deserve to be happy and with someone who treats you good. I should be taking my own advice but oh well. Keep your chin up!
I know your pain all to well. I still feel it 2 years later. I was also blindsided. My husband had already checked out emotionally, I just never realized it. So, I was shocked also, ... Until the pieces started going together. ;( (the OW). :( Best wishes, you deserve better, ... We both do. Prayers.