well, im back

well, its friday night. ive been sick for days. feel a little better. need to get out of thes house tonight. its supposed to rain this weekend of course. sis will take me to the store, but i dont know what im going to get. im getting very broke. will probly get some milk and cereal. boy its so fun here. friday night and all i cna think of is what im going to cram in my face. im realy pissed at chicken. so sick of it. its allways either chicken or cereal. im so sad. at leasste before i could eat what i wanted, thats hoew i got this way. when yu dont work, its vbery easy to get fat. i know im supposed to be using positive words but i just cant tonight, or lately. been realy trying. very antsi,would like to go now but want sis to drive. my car is making some rattling nioses of course, sence im very poor, it will prob break down.so ill just play radio louder, that way people will hear me comming. skiped group yesterday, bad. oh well, what ya ganna do. will try fgor next week. im getting very sad. the deppression is realy bad now. all the meds i take, i feel like im in a big fish bowl. and im not realy living, just barely gonig threw the motions pretty much. its dark and gloomy here. im just very das. oh well, going to get off here for a while and try to get it together and make shopping list. woo hoo!!!!!!!