making sense of the day.... what more can we do?

I went to work this morning. Determined to do a good job - 

my mind did lots of changing along the way - but I've become so accustomed

to that stuff that I just can stay on target, stay in my own lane too, and 

get the job done. I did a lot today and left work just feeling well enough.

Slowly as I drove through the mountains to get home, my mind began to change

a lot. Call it transition. Call it difficult to know what to do about it.

I just kind of became aware of my posture and tossed aside the craziness as much as I could.

Got home and ate lunch, played with Blue and took a shower.

Dressed and then thought to start watching TV.

Maybe the Olympics.

I seriously have been feeling kind of weird. Like life is just going through me

at times..like I'm as thin as a gauze curtain... and seriously like a sense of mortality...And yet as I make sense of it

maybe I am just maturing 'into' my life... the nature of agin? I can complain a lot when I am in the thick

of things - but I took a step back just now - I realize I have a condition and a weakness

and so where I can see myself in society is starting to become clear in a way - it's like a making sense

of things - but I also

know I live a VERY nice life. I have a nice family, I have a nice home, I have a part time job that I can do,

and so there are lots of positives.

I just treated myself to a coffee and pastry at Emil's Bakery - it kind of helped me feel good.

I can focus on the details but stepping back now I am just glad for the day.

Amen!! 

Peace and good vibes you guys,

Mark