we are a part of them

our angels who have passed, i think ive figured why we get so frustrated at things people say....  its because OTHER PEOPLE see things as earthly OR heavenly. there is a distinct line. we are on this side, and those who have passed over on on that side. they see our angels as GONE from this world, and gone from US. and its THAT what hurts or irritates us. ...... you see, i think we are in a kind of NEW PLACE in our lives.  we ARE EARTHLY, of course we are. we are with our family who love and need us, and whom we love. we are here to do what we have to do, to help our loved ones on their journey, to do good deeds, and to do all we can each our own little part that can make this world a better place. ...... at the same time, this other weird thing has happened to us. when our child passed, its not as if they LEFT US, or disappeared. i for one, definately immediately lost my human instinct fear of death. WHY?? because its obvious that i am ATTACHED!  its not DEATH that is the thing. it is another plane of life, it is another part of life itself, call it heaven, afterlife, a place where souls abide. call it what you want.... it is nevertheless, i feel, a kind of "pathway", do you know what i mean? and we have ACCESS to that pathway. we cannot get as far as where our angels are and hence we are asking them for signs etc, but we DEFINATELY have some kind of access to the path to where they are. we can kind of GO THERE, if you can identify? we can kind of access it and although we cant always SEE them there, we can FEEL them. other people look at us in pity, think we are holding onto hopes and stuff... .... but we are not saying it to try and convince them.  they CANNOT understand it because they cannot SEE it. they have no ACCESS to that path, to that special path, bridge, passage way. it is so alive, and we can FEEL our angels there. they pass up and down to us, and we pass up and down to them. therefore we are CONNECTED to them. other people would NEVER understand this.  (in fact i wouldnt try to explain it - they'd probably look at each other and think ive gone dilly!) but thats how i think it is, and i wanted to share that with you.  yes i long for my jessy, and to hold her, and love heryes, sometimes i feel sick and want to vomit, and that is the earthly part of us that is suffering the loss of the physical and verbal bondbut then we have the times when we feel strong, and i hold that those are the times we've journied a bit through the "tunnel" and we're feeling better because we know they are okay. i think also that sometimes thats why we feel a bit "disconnected" from people, and things here. because we've travelled a bit up the path to " peek up the corridoor" and feel at peace cos we were shown - in an unearthly way - by FEELING - that they are okay. they communicate to us through this tunnel, by sending love, and something so awesome, no one could possibly understand. so we are HERE on earth, to do things, to love, to be loved, to achieve for G-d and for our angels.And we also have been shown ANOTHER maybe tunnel dimension, that we can SEE, that we can GO INTO. THAT IS WHY WE KNOW, so strongly, that our angels are not GONE, but that they are just in a new dimension.we are blessed that G-d has allowed us to see this.  i dont know if there is one mom who has not, at some point, made comment that one day we will be re-united with our angels.  i dont believe its a HOPE, or a dream. .... i believe its an absolute knowledge that we have. nor have i detected an inkling of fear of death from any of us moms. WE HAVE CHANGED. a part of our human instinct has changed.  that is what i feellove jan

Replies

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Jan, you sound so sure in all this and I am pleased that you do. It\'s certainly true that many of us have changed our perspective of death. I\'m not sure that I had a fear of death before, but I was always concerned about what would happen to Frazer and where he would live if I passed over, now that concern is not there I look forward to the day I can join him. Maybe I\'m too caught up in the earthly things because although a part of me \'knows\' he\'s ok, as you\'ve said, the sadness of not being able to have him with me in a physical sense overwhelms me. One thing that has changed though, is I now believe that our children are chosen, they are the lucky ones, not those who narrowly survive to stay on this earth. I don\'t know if that is a \'knowing\', or just a belief that helps me to cope with the reality of his death. I am happy that you have found this place and the sense of peace that must accompany it. Your friend, Charlotte. xoxo
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boy is this a good post!!! you hit the nail on the head!!!yes, the anger i feel is people saying to me i am not connected to my son anymore!!!thats it!!! and it completely nullifies his existence..it pisses me off!! then when I say he is ALIVE IN SPIRIT they look at me like i am nuts...boy do i love this post..you said it better then i could..\'we are in this world but not of this world\' ..thanks for saying it..shalom shalom shalom and yes yes yes you have hit the nail on the head...hugs marianne
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Thank you for writing such a profound journal entry.
It speaks volumes and gives so much hope. You are an angel.
Ann
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This is a wonderful journal and I never lost a child . so I could never imagine how and what you go through. I don\'t think you are dilly as you say, it is probally real and the truth. I beleive in angels and god, he is with you and jessy. The bond is still there and always will be. Your a great mother and be proud of the person you are. This journal is so beautiful and powerful thank you for sharing.
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Hi Jan, I cannot begin to comprehend the pain of the loss of a child. However, I do understand how it feels to lose someone I loved very much. I was very close to both of my grandmothers and I definitely still feel a connection with them, even though they are no longer physically on this earth. My grandmothers are not gone from me -- they are watching over me. I have felt their presence in happy times and sad times. I truly believe that I will be reunited someday with my grandmothers, just as you will be reunited with Jessy. And just as I know my grandmothers can still feel the love I have for them, I\'m sure that Jessy can also feel the love you have for her.

Going back to your previous entry...I\'m sorry that your family said the things they did to you. We always have to remember that our family members have their own \"issues\" too. They often mean well and sometimes try to help too much. Also, if this has been going on since you were growing up, could it be that they are just jealous of you and perhaps now jealous of the family life that you have? There was one thing that they said that was correct -- you care a lot about other people and you are very kind. However, I don\'t believe there can ever be too much caring and kindness, and your children are very lucky to have a mom who cares for them like you do! You\'re awesome!

Hugs,

Judy : )
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beautiful!!!
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Definitely a journal entry that empowers me...it allows me to identify this place I am in...thank you...Karen
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you are such a beautiful inspiring woman. you have much knowledge and wisdom. thank for sharing. i\'m praying for you. love and hugs, meg
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Even though our hearts ache, I truly feel we are blessed because we have a glimpse of something much greater yet to come after we leave this earth. I used to fear death and sometimes I still do. I don\'t think it is death itself but rather the way I may die. The unknown always creates some type of fear. I wish I had your absolute knowledge. Most days I have that true belief, it\'s when I let that shadow of doubt creep in that I get discouraged. I find that when I have doubt, I hurt more so I try to keep my faith. I have to believe that there is a plan and it is a perfect plan. Love to you friend. Robin
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beautifully said......you are a hero for your kids and for all women....!!! hope you know how much you are thought of.....lots of love...jann
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This is an incredible insight to the reality of life. I KNOW, have always known, that Kala did not die. She and I continue to communicate and when I shed this earthly body I will join her in the dimension in which she now lives. I have a journey to continue, and fleshly, earthly, human experiences are a part of the journey....a part. I somehow feel my journey began long before this body I dwell in breathed in it\'s first breath, and I know my journey will continue long after the last breath is inhaled. There is no end. There is no death. There is only the journey. Thanks Janice!!
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its really incredible, how we just KNOW this. we are shown this. thank you for all your wonderful input into this. all my love, jan
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Thank you!
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lease read my last journal entry....thank you again
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This is the first journal I have ever read that discribes what we know to be true...We\'re on a journey and there is hope, thanks for posting it.