waking up

and then for some reason, painful undermining thoughts seemed to undercut me 

and so I had to get up in a painful fractured way. It happens more often than not.

 

Yesterday I thought about dealing with my life. No one can save my life for me, I thought.

And yet 'what would saving my life mean?' - and I thought to just take the first step of taking care of myself, my responsibilities and my day...

 

So it seems like all this emotional noise to feel dismayed about my day (as in this morning) - I really just need to keep on the path of taking care of my day - and make those next steps that will occur to me as I take of things.

 

I may have limits but at least my day will be taken care of.