Wakes

I have found that it is slightly different experience to go to a wake after having experienced a major loss.  It's almost like having had an illness that will leave you vulnerable to certain things for the rest of your life. Or the whole thing in the Harry Potter books about wizards/witches who have experienced loss being the only ones able to see thestrals.  Whatever it is, now when I go to wakes, I come out of there completely losing my shit. We went to the wake for Debbie's son last night and it was a mob scene.  I haven't been to too many wakes where a young person has died, and suddenly to boot, and I wonder if this is always the case.  Whatever the case is, he must have really impacted a lot of lives.  I never got to meet  him and that makes me sad.  He very well could have been my stepbrother some day.  He was only 25. I think this has been a little weird for Dad, too, since he and Debbie haven't been dating very long at this point, and since my Mom hasn't been gone very long (9 months tomorrow).  Debbie, though, is smart on so many levels and she really respects where I am in my grief process.  The least I can do for her in return will be to respect where she will be in hers.  I have taken the rest of today off from work to go to the funeral and then the gathering afterwards.  I'm not quite sure why I'm doing it....I guess I just feel like it's what I need to do, and that it's the right thing to do.