Try to stay in the moment
I know very much I want to contribute to the goings on here at the monastery and in life in general. I may not have terrific vision at times in terms of what I could do for myself and others. I tend to ask folks if I can help out during my downtime and also I get proactive about things I know I can do. This morning a familiar fear and dissatisfaction came to mind. Keeping busy but "Wanting more"... "wanting a sense of humbly put ... importance." I've started to tell myself in occasions like this 'just stay in the moment', also I have done this when serving at altar. It helps me focus at anxious times. There is something in me that jerks me out of my reality and undermines my momentum and mojo. I know how to deal with it now though I'm still challenged even so, welcome to life.
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Maybe the importance I seek comes humbly from one relationship at a time. Helping, healing and engaging.
When people work a full-time job, they often want to move up in the company. Added responsibility, more "importance" to the company, etc. I think it's natural.
You've been in the monastery awhile now, right? And maybe, as you say, it's the desire for importance in social relationships there. I like and agree with your comment above about one relationship at a time.
It's something very human to desire!
Thanks GT!!
I agree with MA...I think we all want to feel good about what we do and think about achieving goals
Big hug sweetie...xo
over the course of learning how to let god guide me, one communique at a time, i have pondered what might happen if god woke me each morning with a task list she expected me to perform over the course of a day. yo. . . mighty soothsayer. . . predict this day for me. where's your turban and crystal ball? i've grown fairly convinced that not even god can predict the future.
learning how to detach from my monkey mind and listen for "the quiet voice" in the here and now has gotten me much further than demanding that god give me a syllabus and road map for life. i don't believe god has ever spoken to me in the future tense or even a royal we.
just believing. . .
proof irrelevant,
Thanks Jan and Arfie!!