Today

Over 400 days since I was with my family - 411, since you are ask.

The pain is unbearable. I well up in tears most of the time and feel so broken. It doesn't get easier, in fact it gets harder - I'd hoped by now to have some form of plan to allow me to see them, or have some form of contact with them. Whilst I was inside I spoke to my wife once a fortnight, it's now been 7 weeks and I have virtually no idea of what they are doing. I miss them so much.

My mum who I look after is hard work, and no support for me, I've lost such a lot, and have very little to be positive about. It's only the hope that one day I might be useful to them that keeps me going. I love my wife and children but have lost them - that pain is never going to leave