To remember

Day 51! I made it through the long weekend, and although I was alone, and there were times I had urges, I kept myself busy, and allowed myself to walk through the hard time, and now, I'm at work, at my desk, rested and hopeful.I received a called yesterday from my sister, she is my identical twin. She has struggled with compulsive gambling for years, her addiction started several years before mine did, I used to take care of her daughter, because she was always gone at a casino and I could never understand how someone couldleavetheir daughter, and stay in a casino for days on end. Of course, many years later, I found myself in the same position, a compulsive gambler.My sister isn't in any type of support group, although she would go to meetings with me in the past and she has stated she is a compulsive gambler. I was shopping at an antique mall when she called, and she told me she went back out the night before. It caught me off guard, since its been over a year for her. I found myself having to walk out of the store and catch my breath. She told me it was awful and she regrets it. I thought to myself, she has been so concerned about me, especially this last weekend, she called me a billion times. I felt so guilty for not thinking that maybe she needed some support? She seemed okay, resolved with it, and said she won't go back. I remember that feeling, but I also remember being bitten by the gamblers bug, when I went and came home, I was okay with the lose and going, and it was a matter of a couple of days before I went again, and again, and again, until it just about crippled me.Anyway, to all of you who are in recovery, and to all of you who are still suffering, my thoughts, thanks and prayers are with you. If it were not for your journey, paving it for me, I would be alone during this journey I'm on, called LIFE. xoxoxox Posted on 05/27/14, 12:47 pm