Tired of all of this
I am almost to the end of my job, and I still can't find a job. No one want's to give me a chance, and I don't have experience so they won't even look at me. My interview clothing doesn't fit, the only pants I had ripped today and I have nothing to wear for the job fair next week.
My husband has something bothering him and he refuses to tell me what it is, always saying there is nothing wrong, well sorry I don't believe you, you act different when something is bothering you.
I am becoming so stressed, and aggravated about everything. I am losing all hope that I will find a job, and my depression is just getting worst. I am constantly sick to my stomach from stress, and yet I have to pretend I am okay to everyone around me because they all say "Have faith, something will come" I have been applying for jobs for 3 months and everyone turns me down. I am tired of having faith! Faith is getting me no where except...oh wait, no where.
I don't what what I will do if I can't find something, I can't get unemployment, because in my job I am just an independent contractor. If I can't find a job, I am done, my husband can't pay all of the bills, my car will have to go back which means no way to even find a job. (They will only work with me for a month and considering I have been looking for 3 months, I don't expect to find anything in another month.) And I am sick and tired of being told to be optimistic. That is impossible with everyone turning me down, even places that say "No experience required" I then get an email "We are sorry but you do not have the experience we require." What?!
I am just so frustrated, I can't even eat and am more or less living off of energy drinks and coffee
Replies
Okay, first off, I can relate. My husband talks to everyone but me. Me, he ridicules. And, when I ask him to stop...well, it becomes my fault because I'm a nagging b####.
Sorta puts a damper on "taking care" of his needs. And, no matter how much I try to explain that to him...I am still a b####.
Next, you are worthy. You are going through a dark valley right now. The valleys are always darkest before you get out. Yes, I know you are tired of hearing this stuff. But, Jesus is with you. It's just hard to see or know this right now. The negativity and the enemy are working hard to keep you where you are.
I am praying. Intercessary prayer. Bringing you before the Lord, lifting you issues to the Lord...weather you like it or not. That's what intercessary prayer is all about.
And, I want to remind you about Daniel. In Daniel 10 he prayed daily for something. He did not quit praying...until he received an answer. The angel of the Lord came to him and told him the answer had been delayed because he, the angel, was in a fight that Michael, the archangel, had to take over for him.
But, Daniel finally got his answer.
It is easy to give up on God. But, God never gives up on you.
That's easy for me to say. Hard to remember...I was in hospital, on my death bed (according to doctors) about 10 months ago. But, as you can see, God had plans for me. And, you.
And, there is no time limit on grief, BTW.