Thoughts.....

It's been a while since I've written any journal entry. Normally I write stuff out on my-diary.org but as of now, I thought I'd give it a shot here on daily strength.org. This especially rings true since I have entries on my-diary.org dating back from 2011 (yes, I love to write).

for the past few months, I've been feeling nauseated. I thought I was having a heart attack since, months ago, nausea was being accompanied with heart palpitations. The docs did a chest x-Ray as well as doing blood samples and the I tested negative for a heart attack. I was confused because I've been experiencing a lot of anxiety as well, another element that could possibly indicate a heart attack. Months later, to today, no heart attack has happened. It was a stressful time since I know that heart attacks are expensive in the United States. I knew a guy who went bankrupt due to medical cost behind his heart attack yet he had private insurance........I love this country especially since I spent my entire life here, I just hate the healthcare system we have.

onwards, tomorrow I go see my nurse practitioner. By the way, I may not be a big fan of healthcare here in the U.S., but the nurse who's been discussing my health with me has been really cool. She did a few more blood test on me and lab results show that I'm vitamin D dificient. She prescribed a heavy dose of vitamin D. Hopefully I don't get Vitamin D poisoning. County doctors/nurses in America suck. I wish I could afford Kaiser or Stanford hospital. As for my nausea, the doctors can't find a reason why I'm getting it. I tend to get even more when I exercise so I'm guessing it's from a clogged artery. I'll try to push my nurse and Doctor to figure out what's causing it because I've had nausea for months and it's not going away. Heck, I even hydrate myself everyday.

So far I'm on day 3 of not drinking. Last week I went 4 days with no bud light but I slipped. Thankfully, I stopped myself from drinking after I drank half a 25oz can (I threw the other half of the can down the drain to prevent me from drinking more). Surprisingly, I still slept ok. For a year, I was able to cut down my drinking to just one 25oz can a night. Before, for years, I'd drink two 25oz cans at night before going to bed. Now, I usually drink half a 25oz can every 3 or 4 days. I'm hoping to get it down to 0oz of bud light. It's a hard journey and I tried to ask my doctors for medication to help me ease off the alcohol but they didn't want to because they said I'm "too young". I even have high cholesterol and the docs wouldn't give me cholesterol melds either because I'm, once again, too young for it.