this morning thinking about my mom
this morning i had the experience of waking up -
and not feeling possessing of myself -
i felt the call to duty down at the chapel
and that call had me not feeling satisfied or connected to
my experience here in the room
it reminded me of my mother - who I think had a very
hard time feeling connected to her experience
she once said (or perhaps many times) 'I want to feel
more connected to the universe" -
what I am thinking is that was really a wish to feel her own
experience and somehow deal with her own insecurity of
living life as herself
the same goes for me - I am realizing -
this morning - I woke and just the looming demand for me
to be down at the chapel - had me feeling like I hadn't slept
or rested at all - like i had no personal experience
outside of being together in the group - and so of course
thinking on that - my body jerked compulsively to try
and find or own my life here in my room -
and so I did - and it gave me perspective on my mom
eventually and respect for her and her experience -
and difficulty
now I've got to do a few chores up here before I go down
have a great day
Replies
Big hug sweetie...It's nice that you are so understanding of your mom and what she had to deal with in life
Big hug and a blessing...xo
Thanks Jan