...this little life of mine, i'm gonna try to shine.

here it is.......another soft summer morning.  the air is beginning to cool in Georgia.  i see the occasional yellow leaf floating down to earth.......autumn is on it's way.  the butterfly bushes are in bloom, the real name for these pretty little bushes is Rosecreek Abelia (tiny pink blooms). 

i'm achy and tired, yet i slept well.  noticed that a hose for my cpap equipment has sprung a leak.  medical equipment requires added housekeeping.  some parts need daily cleaning.  some weekly cleanings.  gotta stay on top of it all.  but compared to how i was pre-cpap equipment.......i'll keep my promise to take care of the equipment in order to have this.  this sense of morning.......this quiet precious time that feels like God created it as a gift just for me. 

i can see bits of blue sky peeking through the tall Georgia pines.  there are some tiny cornflower blue flowers on a bit of bush i rooted and planted on the back patio.  don't know if this is a regular plant ......not sure where i got it from, but it's lovely wherever it came from. 

my close by neighbor Ginny is coming mid morning to follow me to the car repair place.  poor Geez (nickname for my buick the geezermobile) is all busted up.  she's getting a new trunk lid that will include the replacment tail light.  they'll check underneath to see if her bumper and the other two parts that protect one during a crash are strong and solid still or need replacing too.  they estimate 3 - 5 days of repairs.  pray that they can finish this week.  pray hard........

i'll be parked right here until it's fixed.  as soon as i get Geez back I'll take both vacuums to the repair shop.  according to the tracking info i should have my new phone system by tomorrow late afternoon/early evening.  good.  very good!  and the return label for the defective set should come today.   gotta get the broken mess back to the seller asap.  ebay said i had to have it back by the 27th, which is tomorrow.  i told them my crazy set of events that led to why there is a delay. praying i'll get the refund for the defective set and not be fined if you will because i can't meet that return date.  they are aware (of my situation) but wouldn't say yes or no to the refund just yet.  i hope i haven't thrown my $31.46 on the ground. 

feel like my home, my car and me all have a weird case of life hiccups.  if it can go wrong it will, but as of today the wind will change.  everything will begin to smooth out.

got a bit of a sinus problem at present.  not as bad as Friday, Saturday and Sunday.  feel less rough.......grateful for that.  the sinus pressure headache has relented this morning......thank you Lord!  stiff lower back that usually gets a little better by ten am.  my head and neck feel all bobbleheady.........but overall i can tell i'm improved.  every little degree of improvement help so much!

7:45 am.......monday monday.........so good to me.  still wake with the ever omnipresent fatigue.  some things never change.

except that i should change gears right now.  some good news......sara is getting ready for her first conference in Washington, D.C.  the event is intense, busy......crazy, fun and exhausting.  recent past events have welcomed some amazing speakers.  From former President George W. Bush, former President Bill Clinton, Condoleeza Rice, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Robert F. Kennedy.......Colin Powell.  So many well known individuals that have helped shape the world.

Every event will bring Sara into a world that may change and reshape some of her own views and thoughts......working with the armed forces, the Pentagon, the US EPA, Dept of Commerce, Dept of Energy....yup, the US DOE, if you can think of a group working with energy and engineers they will be there speaking, exhibiting, attending.......there is a feeling in the office that something big is about to happen.  that the curtain is about to go up on all things energy and engineering......it's exciting and nerve wracking and amazing all at once.  i remember my first conference in downtown Atlanta at the Georgia World Congress Center in the fall of 1990.  I had no idea what was about to happen despite all the planning, all the evidence of what was coming.  it gets a body charged up, nervous but with a feeling of excitement ...... let that curtain rise on this wonderful event. 

i got her a dress, but haven't sent it to her yet......it's a lovely soft purple gray hue......long sleeved, side pockets, floor length.  it's lovely......the event is the third week of September, so there's still time.  i can either send it or take it to her next week once my car is fixed. walmart has a smaller size box for 67 cents, i can get one of those and send it to her.  always trying to think ahead.  if i'd really had it together i would have had the dress sent to her door, but oh that brain fog, it likes to keep me on my toes!

Saturday night Sam attended a gala event, he wore a tuxedo.......whoooweee!  it was at the brand new multi million dollar performing arts center at Auburn University in Auburn, Alabama.  Remember that piano I told you about, the one that Sam helped the university committee buy?  Well it's a very expensive concert grand (it cost more than the current value of my 3 bedroom, two bath, two car garage home) made by Bosendorfer.  They got it in Vienna, Austria in the middle of July.  Well to celebrate the amazing new center and this gorgeous new piano they invited Michael Feinstein to come and play.  Mr. Feinstein is not only a fine and famous musician, he's known as the keeper of the American Songbook.  Sam attended along with fellow colleague Derrick......and Derrick's wife.  They drove to Auburn, checked into their hotel, readied for the event and off they went to dine and shmoooze --- to celebrate all these months of hard work and planning.  I hope to see a picture soon of Sam all dressed up in that Tux.....and yes my son celebrates his born in Texas roots as only a Texan can.......he wore his black ostrich cowboy boots with that tuxedo!  That's southern..........

When they are small you tell them about all the amazing places they will go and all the amazing things that they will do......you don't know but you want to hope that there world will be bigger, more expansive than the one you knew.  My children are a part of that bigger more expansive world.  I hope they enjoy the ride ....... I hope they appreciate all they get to see and do.  We worked hard to give them a world that would afford more opportunities than our grandparents, our parents and yes, what we knew and experienced as well. 

Please pray for Sara's health during the days ahead, she struggles with two health issues and she needs to have as much energy and ability as possible to do all she needs to do.  Please pray for Sam......they've both been overworked and stressed of late and they need to breathe, rest and try to keep their lives in balance.  Pray for Sara's hubby Derian as well, he works hard on his personally designed video game as well as all the work he does for companies with computer IT needs.  Sara and her hubby plan to go to the beach in two weeks......for a break before this event.  Take a week at Gulf Shores Alabama to play in the sand and sea.......to rest and remember why they do all the things they do in order to be able to take a break as well.

Sam had an amazing summer, going to Hawaii and Austria.......but they were both work trips, he needs an honest to goodness vacation. Working on talking him into doing just that.  Both kids plan to go to north Georgia in October.  Sara is going with me for a few days, then Sam comes up to join the party, but we'll be heading back here, he likes a few days all too himself to ride his mountain bikes, to take long hikes and such.  I am TIRED.  too much typing by far.

feeling sick and grateful and tired and proud of my babies.  all growed up babies making their mark in this big wide world of ours.  time to get ready to take my car to the shop.  a shower, fresh clothes......breakfast.  lots to do........moving like an old turtle this morning, the stiffness is ever present, but so is my sense of determination to have more life.  work through the pain, work through the challenges to be out there more and in here less. 

Not this week she said laughingly.......but maybe by next week I can do more, feel better......this week I'll be here puttering, resting and crashing to my heart's content.  Hugs, prayers, love to all and to all a blessed day.