thinking myself into a corner
does anyone else get this way?
I devote so much energy to dealing with people outside of my room -
I try and be a good citizen and I think I succeed - inside during the fact I get nervous/neurotic at times inside -
but after I get back to my room
- I become frozen in thought - as if there's a NOT KNOWING of what to do next
with my time, that is 'some how' like the good citizen person I try and be amongst the sisters.
I was sitting here and I tried to draw and then I thought to write - what should I do?
I thought to myself to do some laundry - and then since I have been sick I thought to do
my sheets and blankets too. Glad I am getting those out of the way- but this is how
I get - Expressing myself helps - I'll get on with some dreaming and play.
Replies
it's just a moment - maybe I should think of things like this as 'just a moment' - I got to tasking
with laundry and I am progressing from there - best not to fixate and drill down on a set of thoughts
that might be answerless - When I let go - it's like the feelings police come after me inside - and draws me down -
anyways - I am just getting on with the day -
Have a great day everyone!!
maybe it's about getting in touch with what I like -going or transitioning
from a world out there - and cozying up to things I like. The two worlds
can mix sometimes - but out there, there is more need to be self policing
to negotiate and navigate it all. Some of my therapists talked of negotiating
others chose navigating - I'll use both - no big whoop.
Getting in touch with what I like also sets of alarms for wanting to go out
there and manifest what I want. My little pursuits I learned in the past
may not be so good for me. Some might say toxic. I am trying to negotiate
now these feelings of desire - with a kind of societal/social context - t
where to go now?? Things are good.
and not just a social context - but a consciousness of healthful stuff.
in my own case, thinking myself into corners was/is a byproduct of my questioning nature. i can, will and do question everything and everybody, most especially my own self. 'tis yet another place to practice radical acceptance, mindfulness and humility. the radical acceptance is of my own questioning nature. the humility is that my questions are not always pertinent and almost never worthy of stopping the show over. let the emotional waters flow and respond mindfully.
Thanks Arfie!!