Things are returning to a new normal.
A new normal, less stressful life is now pretty much mine. I have a few more things on my plate but they are only minor stresses and are not all the time. I have to be more attentive to my father, brother and sister because they don't have anyone else close and all have problems being able to take care of themselves.
My father is not much trouble as long as he is healthy, I don't have to care for him only pay his bills and if he needs it take him to doctor appointments. It is stressful to be around him but I don't have to do it often or for very long so it is manageable.
My sister needs the most care but again I don't have to take care of her just be attentive of her needs and help out when they arise. She is pretty capable of taking care of herself in a day to day manner though needs help with dealing with the world, money and such. I spend much more time with her than I ever did before. Mostly watching TV, dinner and going to church and church functions.
My brother is... read my other journal entries to learn how he is... and gives me the most stress because I shouldn't have to deal with him at all. But it has settled into only twice a month now and should not even be that soon if he finally gets his head together. After that I should not have to deal with him for more than brief times once every few months. Not having him bother me will be the greatest ease on my anxiety and will finally get me to move back into the good moods I used to have when I only had to take care of myself.
Now that my mother has passed on, the financial stresses have gone with her. The $3000 dollars plus that was needed for her each month now takes care of me and my brother and my father's savings and benefits pays for himself. So I don't need to worry about money or finding a job for that matter unless the lack of something to do gets to me too much. The money form my parent's rental property pays for myself and my brother while the state and federal SSI takes care of my sister. My brother may be having a hard time of it not getting everything he wants or everything he needs paid for him now but I have no financial worries probably for the rest of my life unless I do something stupid or there is some great catastrophy.
The only thing I find kinda strange is now that I don't have to be caring for something everyday and sometimes all day, I find I am getting a little bored. I've started exercising which I have needed to do for a while and was not motivated to do. But it fills those times that I find myself with nothing to do. So this is a good thing.
I plan to start walking once the weather gets nice again. I'll need to find some good walking shoes and something to listen to music/talk radio on while outside.
My father is not much trouble as long as he is healthy, I don't have to care for him only pay his bills and if he needs it take him to doctor appointments. It is stressful to be around him but I don't have to do it often or for very long so it is manageable.
My sister needs the most care but again I don't have to take care of her just be attentive of her needs and help out when they arise. She is pretty capable of taking care of herself in a day to day manner though needs help with dealing with the world, money and such. I spend much more time with her than I ever did before. Mostly watching TV, dinner and going to church and church functions.
My brother is... read my other journal entries to learn how he is... and gives me the most stress because I shouldn't have to deal with him at all. But it has settled into only twice a month now and should not even be that soon if he finally gets his head together. After that I should not have to deal with him for more than brief times once every few months. Not having him bother me will be the greatest ease on my anxiety and will finally get me to move back into the good moods I used to have when I only had to take care of myself.
Now that my mother has passed on, the financial stresses have gone with her. The $3000 dollars plus that was needed for her each month now takes care of me and my brother and my father's savings and benefits pays for himself. So I don't need to worry about money or finding a job for that matter unless the lack of something to do gets to me too much. The money form my parent's rental property pays for myself and my brother while the state and federal SSI takes care of my sister. My brother may be having a hard time of it not getting everything he wants or everything he needs paid for him now but I have no financial worries probably for the rest of my life unless I do something stupid or there is some great catastrophy.
The only thing I find kinda strange is now that I don't have to be caring for something everyday and sometimes all day, I find I am getting a little bored. I've started exercising which I have needed to do for a while and was not motivated to do. But it fills those times that I find myself with nothing to do. So this is a good thing.
I plan to start walking once the weather gets nice again. I'll need to find some good walking shoes and something to listen to music/talk radio on while outside.
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