things are good my friends!
I truly feel that I may have a wire loose within my head but it's forcing
me to think about and be as thoughtful and understanding about my life as possible.
yesterday i went to the wedding and it was a super positive nice experience.
i did get my usual nervousness but in part what i had been thinking about yesterday
and which lent itself to managing at the social affair was that 'people experience these kinds of things (dealing with social situations)...what are you (mark) going to do to get through, how are YOU going to handle it??" I kind of saw myself in commonality and relationship with everyone.
I relaxed and didn't worry too much about the social stuff - I was, as I have become more and more, kind of talking at times and also humbly supporting and there for my sister and N.
I did realize that I tend to grab for the food and drink - nearly like impulsively and that is something i want to get away from. I can learn to get through and manage social things in a better way.
so now it's the morning after and I was super focused last night on the methods i was using to 'get through things' and I thought too about 'what the means for myself as well as others' nearly like a point of judgement...and i struggled with that...but this morning i just mixed it all - i know it's not one thing or the other - but both... my humanity and keeping at responsible stuff to get me through - we all have to deal with that.
starting the day here..got a starbucks and sending good wishes for a good day!
Replies
Ha... and I have a screw loose!!.... I am so glad that you were able to talk yourself don't and enjoy the wedding Marky... Nice..... That's not easy to do when you have some social anxiety
I think I would judge you to be a great human being!!..... Big hug.... Enjoy your coffee..... That's what I'm doing to right now.....xo
thanks jannie!! xxoo good vibes for a good coffee and morning!
So glad you had a nice positive experience! Hooray!!
thanks Sensitive!
I am pretty convinced that every brain ever created has at least one proverbial loose screw/wire. I don't trust people who claim perfection. When I can lie to myself, I can lie to anybody.
I believe that "humility" is my most effective tool for managing my social anxiety. Not to be mistaken for "humiliation," humility allows me to stop comparing and simply accept my place in life. That place doesn't need defining nor measuring. Only acceptance. As with lying to myself, the simple acceptance of my place in the world allows me to extend that acceptance to others. I don't need to define nor measure anyone.
Life is a complex weave that my limited human vision will never see in full. No disgrace. Just a fact.
Thanks Arfie!
thanks again arfie, i think when i find humility when feeling anxiety I tend to look to being supportive towards others
as well... finding the humanity - I hear you in the nature of acceptance with you humility extending to yourself and others-
On the note about the idea that life is a complex weave..I do also see the idea that understanding will never be
a whole vision too - i may be pushed by life to try and understand - and yet then it seems I will be pushed
into another moment of not understanding and needing to understand again.