The world cam crashing down today

Well my boss announced today she was pregnant. I felt the walls closing in on me and I couldn't breathe. I feel like I am sinking and there is no life vest in sight. I don't want to get out of bed anymore. I hate my job so there is no comfort there. I was passed over a promotion and am now training my new boss how to run the department and now she gets pregnant too. Fair? I am no honestly believing nothing fair happens in this world. I just have any motivation to get out of bed anymore. I wish people would stop saying that "it will happen for you" and "you'll have your time". Do they honestly think this makes me feel better? Sure why won't they just say, you will have at least one child before you die  at age 90 or whatever. I don't understand any of this. If this isn't all bad enough I found out yesterday that my right breast is infected. Something that usually happens after you have a baby and have been breastfeeding. So lucky me gets the problem but opps, no baby.  I just hate all of this. I could scream, I could cry and I could just sleep forever.It is like losing my first all over again and this is the time that everyone has chosen to leave me alone? My family keeps telling me to concentrate on the positive parts of my life but right now, I can't find any really except my husband. Even that, I see him sad. I see him struggling to and I know he is only moving forward because of I am falling apart. Instead of someone helping me and throwing me that life vest my family is yelling at me to swim. I am so emotionally tired that is just want to sleep and not get out of bed.



I\'m so sorry. You have a life vest here. You can vent and cry and complain all you need to. You\'ve had a giant loss not only physically and also all your hopes and dreams for your angels. You have every right to feel everything that your feeling. I have days where I should get a gold medal for getting out of bed and taking a shower. It has to get more bearable for us, and when we\'re ready we\'ll see the forest from the trees.
((HUGS)) Andrea