The Victorians had it right Wearing full mourning

I’m still somewhat embarrassed to admit out loud that I went through a phase in my teenage years where I was addicted to Harlequin romances, including the “regency” ones involving happily ever after dashing arrogant man meets virginal young woman set in nineteenth century England.  I’ve now graduated to good fiction, mysteries, and thrillers.  But, when I really want to escape, I’ll read a romance and leave the sting of real life behind.  That remains even more important in this crazy new world that no longer contains my son.
What still resonates with me, however, is the Victorian concept of wearing full or half mourning.  Men and women (primarily in the upper class who could afford to change their clothes as needed) in nineteenth century England and the Colonies dressed in head to toe black for at least a year when in full mourning over the death of a close family member.  At the one year mark, they could change to the muted shades of half mourning -- grays and lavenders -- but not all did.  Some stayed in full black as did Queen Victoria for the rest of her life after losing Prince Albert. 
I often think now that we should have kept this tradition.  At least that way, strangers would know immediately upon seeing those of us dressed in full mourning that we hurt.  This would signal to even the most clueless that the throw away “how are you’s” and “have a great day’s” should be avoided when speaking to the woman dressed in full mourning.  Those we encounter as we continue in the world might give us an unexpected kindness or courtesy rather than an unintended painful reminder of what we have lost.  Instead, we walk around in regular clothing of all colors and no one has any idea that we deserve extra consideration or gentle treatment as we grieve.