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the rest of the day free

I have the rest of the day free and open, unplanned except for

getting ready for work later this afternoon... and then I'll be watching

the news and then to bed. I thought of some new thoughts today that

helped me with my sense of hurt and confusion about the complicated nature of relationships after yesterday...

and I spoke to my oldest sister yesterday too after the fact - she added a sense of silver lining and

a positive turn on my downard feeling that helped me seek the light and also know

that others are seeking the light too - and so it added a sense of reinforcement to my bruised

yet usual sense to try and keep positive.

- but now, as I said, I've got free time, after my appointment this morning - and also then ran an errand too -

and both of which, for some reason had and has made my mind go 'big picture' again and I was traveling along, interacting with others and

thinking and trying to understand things and then finally coming home to a full stop..

I think my own natural conservatism (by that I mean my leanings towards being

as practical and pragmatic and clarified) made me forget that the day for me

is about keeping affirmed too and self responsible (sorry kick a dead horse but

I really lose my bearings - I get lost in creative thought a lot and so I have to deal with nuts and bolts components.)

So I am trying to remember to keep affirmed and keep on top of things.

My thoughts that come to me today while I was recovering from yesterday and doing my errands today, as I heard it said in some way partly yesterday (and it's been stewing around), is that

we can make a decision to go in a certain directions towards a goal - but we don't know how it will be until we get there.

Clear enough - but my natural conservatism might make me shut down before I notice that I am even shutting myself

down..... What I've realized is that there will be all sorts of gifts as well as sacrifices along the way towards my goal - my basic thematic goal it could be -

but those peaks and valleys shouldn't deter me from just making a kind of choice for direction in life.

We all "get what we get" along the way in life and at the end too, is what I am coming to just start to think about - success is not 'store bought' - premade or prefab - as an artist I worked with iconography, meme, design and method -- and so I may have as a youth adapted to simplify things into themes and gotten put of course by hitches and mental health challenges - yet I know now is to be grateful for the gifts - and deal with, as we can, the 'unexpected and derailments' that comes at times -

and still keep 'on goal' (which can change within ourselves or through circumstances) is all something I am starting to see...

I can't be more specific about it - as I'm kind of seeing that I can't see the end product before I get there - I can kind of

envision it - but there will be things and influences and manifestations that will have their own life and make us make decisions and make changes along the way. It's a good idea to keep fortified with good spirits and a good mind to carry

you along the way.

Replies

arfie 03/21/2022
success is getting what you want
happiness is wanting what you get
since i've started going for the happiness instead of the success, i've become more and more convinced that i never really knew wtf i really wanted in the first place.

but whether i go for the success or the happiness, bad days are gaurandumteed. . .
it's what i do with those bad days that develops my character.

malibumark 03/21/2022
Thanks beautiful spirit Arfie!

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