The Quiet Place Project

It was a website kind of like DS (though honestly quite a bit less organized) for people, usually young people, to rant and comment on each other’s posts. I found out that it got shut down.

It used to be my go-to before DS. I remember posting about how my parents didnt attend my junior high graduation. I must have been 12 and 13. Back then, my posts were so horribly rambly and hopeless, like some of the stuff you might see on your front page from people you don’t know here. I still felt guilty and unconfident. And hopeless.

When I came here, I met people who changed me. Or encouraged me to change for the better. A lot of those people are gone now, and I miss them. 

Though the Quiet Place Project existed at a time when I was less mature and I basically used it as a rant outlet instead of anything productive or self healing, I respect it for being the first place I decided to express myself and be free, finally, with everything that I hadn’t said for years. 

I think I joined this site when I was 13. I remember a few people who were there at the beginning. Cachetteen1, Triunfadora, H.E.A.L, Mid, bridgie101, beachshore, and I know there was one more but I can’t damn well remember their name. 

Some people saw something in me. I certainly didn’t. Even looking back, I don’t see much in my ramblings from when I was 13. Whatever they saw, I’m grateful they stuck around for a bit.

Sometimes I feel as if DS has changed for me over the years. I don’t make posts as often anymore because I don’t feel comfortable being in this... public eye, pool of strangers who I have to explain and give context to. I usually only journal to myself, but I also become lonely doing that (the one actually reads these, you know who you are, I’m thankful for you). It can be therapeutic but also stifling when I don’t feel as if I can speak out in a group.

I spoke out today in r/raisedbynarcissists talking about the situationn with my dad (a different post than the last journal). And then I reached out to several others with comments and encouragement and advice. Then I did the same here on DS. It feels.... good. I realized I haven’t done that in a long time. Reached out to groups of people. Interpersonal relationships feel great but I also don’t want to keep confining myself to them because I’m “shy” I guess is the word. 

Nowadays I help with no obligation, simply because I wanted to. No followup, no obsessing over my word choice. It’s over, falling into the help-hole and becoming a help-whore. 

...I guess I should post more here. In the groups. It’s difficult when most posts in support groups are of such a negative air. It feels wrong to just talk. Personal stuff. It’s hard to break out of my shell and also hard to find new people.