the power to make your life

having this illness often leaves me feeling like I am at a deficit

and my life's direction is up to others to decide and to make.

My Dad though, very subtley keeps telling me my life is in my hands.

It's inspiring. I sometimes feel like my hands are tied - I sometimes feel like

my courage is low, my need for control very great - and my ability to deal with my humanity

or to accept it (warts and all) a very tough thing to do - as well as to feel ok about.

But today my Father spoke to me. I said something like "I may be headed for a board and care sometime again 

in my future life" - His reply was "That's for you to decide" - Illness does take away our ability sometimes - but

I am inpsired by my Father's words to go ahead and aspire some more. Keep trying. To try and manage and achieve in my own life.