the happy and the not so happy......surviving life's storms!

the Owls Christmas Party ...... the new facility is still in the process of rejuvenation, but done enough to host our group's holiday party!

all the tables were covered in red and green.......every table had a holiday centerpiece....Santa Claus hats.....brightly colored shiny Christmas Trees......all very cute, so festive!

people dressed in holiday sweaters, holiday jewelry........sparkly lady shoes........ready for fun!

there were several long church tables covered in turkey, ham, appetiserss, veggies, casseroles, salads.........amazing desserts.......another table of drinks.......and all around the Christmas tree were gifts all wrapped and ready for the white elephant exchange later.  everyone gets a number and there's a lot of happiness as people share what they received. sometimes people will "steal your gift" and that leads to all sorts of nonsense and general ribbing.  this year a lot of people wanted a salt lamp......and it ended up landing on pretty much every table top before the gift exchange ended!

three gentlemen entertained us with music.  a guitarist, a drummer and a keyboardist.  they played some classic 70's rock, old school hymns and wonderfully nostalgic Christmas Carols.

it was all very nice.........a fun time for all!!!!!!

i had no appetite, everything tasted off.......even my favorite cookies tasted nucky........since i know these folks are amazing southern cooks, it had to be me.  after i left i went to run two errands.  p/u a med and p/u microbeads at walmart.  i drove to the pharmacy area and then drove RIGHT BY THE PHARMACY without realizing I had done so until I was almost at the wal of mart.  doh!!!!!!!!

no electric carts available so off i went with a regular cart to the back of the store for online p/u.  my neck and upper arms have been really angry and with every step in that store it got worse and worse.  pushing that cart was so rough.  what was happening?  the nausea was climbing.......and i had brain pain, the kind where it feels like someone is twisting the back of your head with a vice grip.

i got the microbeads, picked up a yard of baby blue flannel.....a roll of blue thread and some needles (with bigger holes to help me out) and finished with wal mart......then went all the way back to the pharmacy. 

came home and knew i was in all kinds of trouble physically.  i couldn't lift either of my arms......i was trying to pull a pan down off a higher shelf and i had to use my opposite arm to hold up my other arm.  now what?  that can't be good.

my legs went numb at the party, then again while i sat for a few minutes at wal mart.......i had to get up each time to stop the progression of the numbness, which is also concerning as the last thing anyone wants is for me to fall........a walmart employee named Junior looked a little scared, but he helped me like a real champ!  concerned and calm despite being rattled.  i always try to calm people down so that the best outcome may happen if at all possible. i'm much more used to this wonky crazy body than they could realize.....only people like us know that symptoms come and go.......by then my eyes were getting twirly.......and Junior noticed that too.  i went straight home........movingon.

the migraine hit very very hard and continued to rage and storm Wednesday, Thursdsay and for more than half of today.  I still feel brain pain, but it's so much better than it was.  I was sitting up both nights holding my head and crying........i took several showers as the warm water helps alleviate the pain some.......i used washclothes and sipped cold water.  soooo thirsty........and the water had to be icy icy cold. i managed to make top ramen that first night, but in the end all i did was sip the ramen broth.  the next day i ate scrambled eggs, but half way through my tummy said no more.  so i didn't finish the eggs or the toast.  the only escape was to try to sleep, so that was my goal ........

i was supposed to start taking the antibiotic cipro.......and i was supposed to start taking plaquenil so on Thursday night i  did.  this may be beyond my normal level of stupid........but it made sense to me.  i was taking the ondansetron to control the nausea.....so i reasoned if it could keep me ok with migraine nausea, then it could keep me safe from any nausea causing problems with the other two meds.  still it was overall dumb, stupid......ay yi yi yi,  i should have just waited until today when things were calming down.

this morning i finally remembered that i had ketorlac, so i took one.  wrapped my head in washclothes and waited for it to help.  it seemed to calm things a little bit at a time.  i was moving very cautiously.......i would sit on the bed for a long time, so long that i didn't remember if i was about to go to the bathroom or if i had already been and was ready to lie back down.

so confused.  i was going to send my nurse an email but she hadn't sent me her email address yet.  she usually checks on me, but this time i hadn't heard from her......in the end i called optum rx to get my regular prescriptions, they got my order but didn't order them, good thing i called or i would have been in a real mess next week.  they got my order ten days ago and did zip, zero nada. 

they said they would put a rush on the order so they should arrive by dec 20th.  i hope this is true.......then i contacted my regular doc to get a regular migraine blocker.  i need to go tomorrow to pick it up, it's the generic version of imitrex.  next time i have an  infusion i will take one that first day......and then as needed for the next few days.

lisa reminded me that i can always call 911.  that's not the sort of thing that would occur to me, i think i have to hunker down and simply try to survive.  hard to think of putting on clothes, riding in my car or in an ambulance.......i would have been vomiting for sure. oh mercy.......it never occurred to me to call anyone.  i think when your pain levels are like that you can't also function as one's own best advocate.  i did several things right, but i also didn't take as good a care of myself as i would have say of my own child if they had a migraine. 

the good news is that i have tomorrow to recup yet before my sleep study on sunday night.  that is excellent........i can get my little suitcase out of the garage tomorrow and have that ready to take as well.......it will all work out.

dishes are done, trash in the garage........laundry is ready to go in the dryer and i had a lovely long hot shower.  i feel almost human!!!!!!!  praise God that the storm is past.  praying for you........please stay safe, warm and share what i can pray for in care of  y ou!