the future...one never knows...do one...?
bravery, smarts, luck, standing up after you've fallen down.
I wonder what I can do with my life professionally...what am I capable of...
what do I want? Grace me with the self confidence and power to effect my plans
and make change and so "do" ....
I go back to work tomorrow, after my weekend off. I look forward to it. I may work
a low profile job - it does make me feel productive though, but I think my fear of change
is holding me back. Fear of change due to my knee knocking unsuredness after having
gone to the hospital so many times, after having lived in a 'board and care' for so many years...
and now I have transitioned to living alone - on my own - back in the saddle nearly of a normal
life - of self responsibility- of the main stream (in relations to my disability).
I am reckoning the negativities I run into daily - and I have realized they are just part of life...
they will be there.... and so will the good moments... thank god... and all that's left and holding me
back is to perpetuate 'self belief.' I can do this... I can believe.. I do believe... I don't know if "sky's the limit"
but I do know that I can try something - maybe conservatively hedging against my nature to put myself somewhere
where I can succeed. Bravery and wisdom. It's hard to have both. Anyways just thoughts. I go to my therapist in a little bit. I really don't know if I want to talk to her. I'll decide after this session. Peace and best,
Mark
Replies
I hope the sky is not the limit I should be challenging. Only bird shit and fools fall out of the sky. I like to keep my feet connected to Mother Earth, thank you all the same. An escape fantasy of being a hawk is a whole different event in Arf world.
I disagree that it's hard to have both bravery and wisdom. I believe courage is a natural by-product of wisdom. Courage born of other sources is more often foolish bravado than bravery.
Believe in yourself, my fellow questioner. You can. You've earned it the hard way.
You have been through a lot and have made significant positive changes in your life. Living alone is a big step. I also work a "low profile" job and I like it because it doesn't cause much anxiety or stress. With my BP I just don't deal with those things very well. I, too, have come a long way and I like the peace I now have.
thanks so much Becky and Arfie!!!