the final desserts
I walked to the haricutter today and I walked home looking forward to indulge a bit
in some delicious foods and beer I bought for myself at the Trader Joe's this morning.
I turned on the boob tube and sat on the couch and ate and drank. I don't know about
you, but sometimes I project that things will be really nice, and this has been nice, but I'm
pretty sure I'll go out for another walk later on. Succinctly what I am trying to say is - on a level
I would have prefered to have been with friends drinking and eating and forgetting my cares rather
than doing it solo - observing that is a good thing - and sorry to complain. I am grateful and it's been a nice thing. Got to do laundry now. Peace and good vittles. :)
Replies
I don't see this as complaining. You are just expressing how you feel as you write the journal entry and that is okay HOpe your day improved today. Have a nice night and nice Sunday too.
thanks Becky!!!
I doesn't believe you, my questioner. My spider senses believe the depths of your questioning nature would question the nature of a jolly good time with friends as deeply as you question the nature of your time alone. Questioners question. Don't complicate it, nor worry that I am saying that like it is a bad thing. Radical acceptance of my own questioning nature has helped me to do it well. Practice, practice, practice.
For what it's worth
'Twas a time I used my questioning nature to question myself into chronic low self-esteem, etc. Ya think maybe that qualifies as not a good use of a questioning nature?
thanks arfie. today truly turned to shit. i can never seem to be able to keep busy enough for the mind to just exist. i feel kind of low and i know that we all go through that at times. I walked to the haircutters, I went on the treadmill, work and grocery shopping ...but i feel like my mind 'that changes so much' makes it so
that I find it hard to make plans. I am usually just trying hard to make sense of things - and so it probably seems like I am in an infinity loop when I journal here. Perhaps I won't self judge but it's never an easy time transitioning for me - and maybe that's what I need to see it as - maybe I can start scheduling time for 'planning' - like at a certain time of day - for a certain time period. I seem to thrive with the schedule of tv news shows, and taking meds, bedtime and work etc... maybe I just need to kind of structure
my futurizing time too. I can do that.
If I don't understand, life is as life is. If I DO understand, life is as life is. ~Zen proverb
After much questioning, I have decidedly decided that understanding is over-rated. My quest to understand has mostly spoiled allot of truly great shows for me. The playful majesty of a butterfly's flight is far more entertaining when I leave the analysis aside and *just* enjoy the show. It is all the same to the butterfly, whether I understand or not.
Maybe you *just* need to love yourself the way God made ya.
Thanks Arfie, big hug