the choices I make
I was out with my brother yesterday and for some reason, I came home
thinking about the choices I make 'out there' and then back home 'in here' as well.
How do I handle certain life stressors or pressures or influences when around others
and too how do I handle certain choices and pressures when I am alone. I kind of
see how I am stepping up or falling short or deciding about certain life pressures and influences.
I am here home right now and my body was really shaky today - I don't really know
why - but it started to manifest kind of stomach rumbly and nauseating feelings too.
I nearly cancelled my yoga class but now I am just thinking of going. I'd like to
have a companion with me today but I don't...so how I am going to shape my day... it's my choice.
So just watching CNN right now and I'll go to yoga soon and then to my parents' house.
I am kind of thinking about giving my self some special treatment by going to yoga.
I can do this.
I hope you guys are having a good Sunday. We deserve good things.
Replies
I am of the camp who believes that company changes brain chemistry. Early into my psychotherapy, I had a shrink or three go into great, but wasted detail of that chemistry when I have come in from wilderness retreats, still unable to interact, but able to sit among fellow humans and felt like I was short circuiting on the exposure. I may not have retained the detail and feel certain the theories have changed by now, but the seed was planted and has evolved to include observations of the diffs between the different chemistry mixes. Friend vs. therapist. Random company vs. somebody I care about. Etcetera, etceteri.
And somewhere around etceteri, I remind myself that I don't want to think myself down yet another psycho rabbit hole. It gets murky down there.
yeah arfie. I hear you - I just feel like I am both growing with the therapist and yet maybe just changing the music on the same broken instrument. I feel totally worried and anxious today and as I just got home from being with my parents, I have to set now to drown out the anxiety some way. I can't eat!!! I am a chubba bubba as it is. Sending good vibes. Mark
I have gone through so many phases with those same feelings. I think working in customer service was both helpful to get me out there but a hinderance when anxieties came up again. It could happen again, but those are exactly the things in therapy that I’ve developed more and more and more push-through capabilities. I think having that awareness is the biggest thing.
thanks Sensitive!!