The Cup
Today i will have two rocks to talk about. I missed last nights. This first rock i will talk about is the pain i am feeling. 1) My wife Sarah...
I love my wife Sarah dearly. I never in a million years thought i would cause her the pain i have. I do not like the fact she shuts me out and always has though. I feel like she never expresses to me how she truly feels until it is too late. Knowing now what i know, i am shocked and realized that she has. I have not listened. Sarah has always run to someone else when she is upset. she runs to her parents. I truly hate that fact, but know understand why she has done that. Knowing this fact makes me hurt because even then, i pushed her away further then too. This is too hard for me to talk about right now. I miss her soo much and pray that this divorce idea stops. i know she hasnt filed yet and says she doesnt know when she will.... WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?!?!?!?! God i hope that she truly doesnt want this and is just hoping that i do change. With whomever reads this, be my witness. I will do what it takes, get the help i need, and fix myself for this marriage.
5) My problem Sleeping. That is sort of an easy one to talk about. For years i have had problems sleeping. I always have weird dreams when i get sleep, resulting in the fact that i wake up. When i get sleep, i wake up feeling like i just went to bed. Not refreshed. I am always tired and i always have headaches, and that frustrates me. When i try to sleep, i get woken up all the time by my kids and wife, at least i did when they were here. I now that i should have spent more time with them when they were here.
My head really hurts right now. Please, if anybody reads this, pray for me. Pray for sarah, and pray for us together. I do not want this to go the way it is going so far. I realize that in order to fix this, i must fix myself and prove to myself that i will stay this way. I love her deeply and want to show her that i do and want to fix this.
I love my wife Sarah dearly. I never in a million years thought i would cause her the pain i have. I do not like the fact she shuts me out and always has though. I feel like she never expresses to me how she truly feels until it is too late. Knowing now what i know, i am shocked and realized that she has. I have not listened. Sarah has always run to someone else when she is upset. she runs to her parents. I truly hate that fact, but know understand why she has done that. Knowing this fact makes me hurt because even then, i pushed her away further then too. This is too hard for me to talk about right now. I miss her soo much and pray that this divorce idea stops. i know she hasnt filed yet and says she doesnt know when she will.... WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?!?!?!?! God i hope that she truly doesnt want this and is just hoping that i do change. With whomever reads this, be my witness. I will do what it takes, get the help i need, and fix myself for this marriage.
5) My problem Sleeping. That is sort of an easy one to talk about. For years i have had problems sleeping. I always have weird dreams when i get sleep, resulting in the fact that i wake up. When i get sleep, i wake up feeling like i just went to bed. Not refreshed. I am always tired and i always have headaches, and that frustrates me. When i try to sleep, i get woken up all the time by my kids and wife, at least i did when they were here. I now that i should have spent more time with them when they were here.
My head really hurts right now. Please, if anybody reads this, pray for me. Pray for sarah, and pray for us together. I do not want this to go the way it is going so far. I realize that in order to fix this, i must fix myself and prove to myself that i will stay this way. I love her deeply and want to show her that i do and want to fix this.
Replies