The Art of Lonely

I'm 53.  I have no children.  No dog or cat.  My husband passed away in March.  I live alone. 
I've never been lonely. 
That may sound strange coming from me.  But it's true.  I'm a 53 year old widow who's never been lonely.  Some would say I'm lucky in that regard, but luck has nothing to do with it.  Being an only child does.
For many people, especially people in our situation, being lonely just comes with the package after losing a spouse.  If your children are gone, you end up spending long hours with no one to talk to.  For most people, this is new.  They've had siblings and parents around when they were younger, later to be replaced with a spouse and children of their own.  In my case, there were never siblings around.  And my cousins lived miles away.  I had to adjust to coming home and being  by myself at a young age.  My parents were strict--which meant no sleepovers at other peoples homes.  It was rare that I had other children spend the night at my house either.  So at an early age, I learned the art of being alone.
I can sit in the house all day without a single person to talk to and never think about it.  I eat at restaurants by myself, shop by myself, go to church by myself--in short, I spend a great deal of time without anyone around.  I also spent 20+ years working in a cubicle.  Again, no one to talk to.
How do I do it?  Simple.  I learned at an early age not to focus on being alone.  Instead, plan around it.  In other words, many people make plans to do things involving others.  They think--I would like to go to that restaurant with this or that person.  And if that person is not available, they end up sitting home thinking about it.   I, on the other hand,  see myself sitting in a restaurant by myself.  If one of my friends decides to join me, I see it as a plus.  Some days I'd rather be alone, so I don't even ask anyone else and will turn them down if asked.
If I'm going to a restaurant, I carry a good book.  I like places with ambiance--nice classical music, for example.  I sit back, relax, read my book.  Sometimes I read religious material.  At those times I feel the presence of God, so I'm not alone.
I join groups if I want time with others.  I've been in reading groups, cooking groups, foreign language groups. 
At home, I make plans for the day.  Two hours of studying Spanish, for example.  Read another chapter in my book, write another chapter in a story I'm working on.  Watch a certain program on television.  I plan special evenings too.  I bought wine and cheese to watch a French film later in the evening.  In short, I find that if you don't plan, you become bored.  This leads to feeling lonely, followed by feeling sorry for yourself and then depression about the whole situation.
I guess what I'm saying is that not feeling lonely is an art form.  It requires careful planning.  If you plan a full day, you won't notice that you're alone.  You may even come to enjoy it.
Oh, and I love having lunch by myself.  I never ask anyone.  Never accept invitations.  It's me time.  Speaking of which,  I better get back to work.  I think I've overstep my lunch hour.