It's the fourth of July and I am at home this evening as the sun disappears and the fireworks start to come out. I think that I am somewhat depressed because normally I would want to be out and around everyone and everything that's going on. I drank like a half bottle of champaign and it is only somewhat taking to me. I want to go to bed. It's only nine and I can't justify going to bed this early. Tomorrow I am going to work at the museum of nature an science. This week I will be working with the younger group and I like that because I can feel free to stay at the desk even when I get there a little early. Plus I have someone to talk to who is a little more centered around my age. Maybe I can ask them some questions about my research and see if they know about arms in different countries compared to our own well back with our own too. For some reason I have really gotten upset at my father for marrying Chi. I don't like the fact that they are together... she doesn't even know how to take care of him. He is not living the life that he wanted to while he was drifting into retirement. she cant even talk to him. There is no major construct of sentences. It is almost the fact that they can't talk to each other. He is basically teaching her English when he didn't even have to do that for Lucas and I, we just went to public school. I think that I want to go to bed early and then wake up early and start to work on my presentation for Tuesday. I know that I meet with my group on Monday and I want to have something to show for my team. We have done a lot today. We went to the Cherry Creek Arts Festival and then came home and ate and I drank some and ever since we have been watching moves, which is relaxing and I enjoy it, however I do love the excitement of being with my friends and roaming the streets going from bar to bar and experiencing the fun of the festivities. Oh well, I guess I am not apart of that anymore. I don't need to and never had gotten in trouble with anyone regarding what I did in my free time. That is why I think that I will get elected to office some day. All but the fact of being gay but I have not fucked up like a lot of gay people do thus we all get a bad rap for that crap. I want to go up to my room and watch will and grace. I need to rearrange my bedroom so that when I am laying down I can see the television right in front of me. I guess that is not a huge deal. I just want to be able to relax and watch TV without waving to turn my head. I don't know why I am making a huge concern out of all of this.