Taking some time off
I have not been on DS that much in the last week or two, just popping on occasionally to see what is going on with everyone. I'm pretty much going to echo Lindsay's (LMWT) journal from last week and say that its just so hard right now for me to be on DS. Having a miscarriage sucks no matter when or how it happens, but I'm struggling even more with my mc being so close to the holidays. It's been 2 months, and its still so raw. Some days are much better than others, and I know its a process and will just take time. I've been saying that 2013 is our lost year.....we pretty much are in the exact same place December 2013 as we were in December 2012....childless and without one in sight. It hurts to know we spent this year chasing our tails, going through treatments, procedures, heartache and still we have nothing to show for it. Even the one month that I spent pregnant, I didn't fully enjoy because of the anxiety and nerves of something going wrong.
There has been so much good news lately on DS, and please know I am truly happy for all of you....you are a wonderful and deserving bunch of women and you are an inspiration knowing you are kicking IF's ass. Nobody should struggle like we do. And I really hope nobody is offended when I say that your good news is only a painful reminder to me of my bad news. I am not proud of the envy and self-pity, but we all know its part of this cruel IF battle. Again, I am thrilled for the good news, and I hope it continues, but right now I'm finding it just too hard to be so active on DS.
I'll be checking in and commenting here and there, and of course I will be thinking of you all.
Happy Holidays and love to all xoxoxo
There has been so much good news lately on DS, and please know I am truly happy for all of you....you are a wonderful and deserving bunch of women and you are an inspiration knowing you are kicking IF's ass. Nobody should struggle like we do. And I really hope nobody is offended when I say that your good news is only a painful reminder to me of my bad news. I am not proud of the envy and self-pity, but we all know its part of this cruel IF battle. Again, I am thrilled for the good news, and I hope it continues, but right now I'm finding it just too hard to be so active on DS.
I'll be checking in and commenting here and there, and of course I will be thinking of you all.
Happy Holidays and love to all xoxoxo
Replies
I get it! Take good care of yourself!
Take all of the time you needWe will beere when you need us! h
IF is unbelievably cruel and I\'m sorry for everything you have been through. The Holidays are the worst because they mostly are centered around children and without knowing if/when you will ever have a child all the hubbub just becomes an excruciating reminder of the heartache of being childless. Just know you are not alone in the way you feel and your struggle and we are all here for you 100%. Take all the time you need. Big hugs!
Take the time you need, you have to do what is best for yourself. Holidays are such a hard time. It is so unfair and I understand the feeling of self pity when others get the one thing you have been dreaming of for so long. Hang in there...sending you big hugs. Xoxo
We all need a DS break sometime, this I understand as I had a few myself. Take all the time you need. I am always here for you by phone and your always in my thoughts.
i can imagine the place you are in right now. Last Christmas I was so depressed and miserable and that was just with dealing with IF, not a loss. I can only imagine how that depression magnifies esp around this time of year. You\'re always in my mind, friend. Sending lots of love your way!
I guess all of us DS girls, some of us who have gone through a mc and some who has not, absolutely understand your pain . You do need a break, sometimes, even DS can seem to be annoying with all the good news and sometimes you can feel that you couldnt have survived without DS, but that is a phase in this infertile journey..... I hope that 2014 brings you more clarity ,more love, more hope and more of everything wonderful and less hurting.. sending loads of hugs and love your way.. take care ...
I completely understand your need for the break!! Please know this.
Enjoy your Holidays hun, and sending you big HUGS!!