taking over my life

 So, this is the spectacular event of last night: The girls, R and Z came over. I sat them down and let them talk. And this is what they told me:The house is not mine.The life insurance is not mine. The savings is not mine. The money in the estate account is not mine.They told me I have been "grossly misinformed" by my lawyer and I am going to lose everything and they do not want me to be "shocked" when that happens.  Last week, Z was so disrespectful to me that I angrily told her how much she and R hurt her father when he was alive by not visiting him unless he BEGGED her to. Last night R told me through clenched teeth that "if I ever talk to her sister again like I did last week she will sue me for all I've got."!!!  I laughed.  I said, "You are already suing me for all I've got. What else is there?" Then, I asked them to leave. I changed the locks to the house. R was so volatile, angry, hostile.  This is a TERRIBLE way to have to live. I cannot believe this. I thought this happened to OTHER people. Not to me. I am a nice person, a good person.   My life is gone. The life I had. I had a family, a husband, a daughter, four stepdaughters. We would get together with other family, on Shabbat, upstate, here, go to the Family Circle meetings. I and my honey would go dancing on Sat nights, I went on Mon nights.  I would come home from work and shout, "Honey, I'm  home!" and go into the kitchen and get supper started. Then I would go upstairs, change into comfy clothes, and then go into my honey's office and we would chat a bit. Then I would be back downstairs, checking my email, cooking dinner. When dinner was ready we sat in the DR together, ate together, talked about our day, our work. Maybe went for a walk after dinner. Watched some TV, read together. By 11:30 PM we were ready for bed, to do it all over again. It was harmony. It was love. It was our life.  Now, all that is gone. I have no husband. My daughter lives overseas. My stepdaughters are treating me like the enemy. My in laws will have nothing to do with me. All I have is my house, which is empty, and my cats. And me.  And my friends. My parents. My sister. My brother.  I am fighting. Fighting for my life, for what is rightfully mine. to have a life, for my home, my possessions, my money. I have barely grieved yet. I will probably not be able to grieve until all this is OVER.  What a shanda.

Replies

laurabp
laurabp

Rachel, this is terrible; what does your lawyer say to all this? Seems like you ought to be able to sue them back for harrassment or something. You don\'t deserve to be subjected to all that stress. You probably don\'t want to have any more conversations with the steps unless there is an impartial witness present. Thinking of you and hoping things get better soon. laurabp
rsusselj18
rsusselj18

Hi Laura, yes I have shared all this with my lawyer and yes, I will NOT be speaking with the steps without him. Thank you for your thoughts. Stress does seem to be a major player in my life these days. How are YOU?
deleted_user
deleted_user

Oh Rachel, How awful that you have to continue to endure this from those you thought loved you. I know you have heard this hundreds of times, but grief does change people. Who could have imagined it would have turned out like this. My heart goes out to you.
Our beautiful life sounds much like yours. And now, I too come home to an empty house (yes, with cats too). It is so sad and will never be the same.
Sending you some love and hoping for peaceful days ahead, with a little help from your lawyer!
Susan
lindalun
lindalun

Rachel:
Gieving is hard and with all of this problems my heart goes out to you. I just lost my husband on July 4th, 2009 and the pain only gets bigger and bigger. Life continues for eveyone else except for us. I miss him so much that I don\'t want to continue living but because of my two kids I need to continue. I am sorry for your loss and as to you stepdaughters just ignore them and have the lawyer deal with them. You need to mourn the loss of your husband. They never cared for their dad and are only looking for financial gain at this time. It is pitiful for them to behave this way. My prayers are with you.