Surviving our loss sucks big time. Its been 4 years in Nov.
Its been 4 years in November and all I can say is that surviving sucks.
We have to live with our loss as we have no choice in the matter. Its not the life I imagine for myself at 57 years of age that is for sure. We were to retire together and be happy doing what we enjoyed. Alas! It did not work out that way for me. I wasn't supposed to be forced back into the work force or be a single widow woman looking for a man at my age. It sucks. Its just my own thought but I think most women my age are forced to be happy just the way the are now. Finding a single man at our age I would say is next to impossible and so what is the point. What is the point of all this anyways? It feels so futile, useless and fruitless. What hope do any of us have anymore? Even with my faith in God, where is He in all this. I have been unemployed since 2008 and widow woman since 2009 so where is God in all this and what purpose do I have left to fulfill. It all sucks. I have been praying since 2008 and 2009 for all these changes to come into my life but nothing has happened. I know its in God's hands. I cannot for the life of me figure my life out. I think God must be laughing at where I am now in my life. I don't find it so funny. I just have a need to vent all these frustrations and things that are bothering me down on this site. I feel like throwing something against the wall about all these things. I don't want to damage my place. If money were not the issue I would have moved a long time ago but on the other hand I love the location and I am close to everything. The location works for me. Just needing to vent from DB
We have to live with our loss as we have no choice in the matter. Its not the life I imagine for myself at 57 years of age that is for sure. We were to retire together and be happy doing what we enjoyed. Alas! It did not work out that way for me. I wasn't supposed to be forced back into the work force or be a single widow woman looking for a man at my age. It sucks. Its just my own thought but I think most women my age are forced to be happy just the way the are now. Finding a single man at our age I would say is next to impossible and so what is the point. What is the point of all this anyways? It feels so futile, useless and fruitless. What hope do any of us have anymore? Even with my faith in God, where is He in all this. I have been unemployed since 2008 and widow woman since 2009 so where is God in all this and what purpose do I have left to fulfill. It all sucks. I have been praying since 2008 and 2009 for all these changes to come into my life but nothing has happened. I know its in God's hands. I cannot for the life of me figure my life out. I think God must be laughing at where I am now in my life. I don't find it so funny. I just have a need to vent all these frustrations and things that are bothering me down on this site. I feel like throwing something against the wall about all these things. I don't want to damage my place. If money were not the issue I would have moved a long time ago but on the other hand I love the location and I am close to everything. The location works for me. Just needing to vent from DB
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