struggling with ideas and influences
I decided not to text my Dr. because she is on vacation, I want her to have fun and be free of my stuff, but I find that my spinning is happening without
regard to how I want to handle my day. So I am writing here.
I have been struggling with the need to keep humble in my life....since when I go for life without a sense
of restraint, and with my own sense of fun, I can become really high flying moodwise and in actions as well.
I find myself trying to be friends with the limitations in my life and yet it's not going so good right now.
With the clamping down on my whims and appetites, anything outside of what is self responsible,
I find myself just living really simply and drilling down on ideas perhaps because I am not really satisfied (and frankly I love my family but I guess I am a little jealous of my siblings who live such terrific lives.) I feel bad for saying that.
There's a lot to be thankful for in my life. My family supports me so much as do my friends - and so gratitude and perspective
that I have been relying on my therapist so much and she has opened so many mental pathways for me to
grow healthfully. Like I wrote earlier - she really is my lifeline. Here too. DS has been and is a lifeline.
I wrote to myself last night that I need to find 'a logic' to dealing with my life outside of work and my responsibilities
but maybe my resolutions can be in allowing myself to feel good and have fun in a positive way.
I hope you guys are having a good day. Sending peace and namaste.
Mark
Replies
returning peace and namaste quicker than you can blink ;p lol you are a good bloke marco. Be gentle with yourself my friend, you are worth caring about a lot! laters :-D
Allowing yourself to feel good and have fun sounds like a goal to cherish for every day of your life. The most stressful of days can be tolerable when I can add a spot or three of fun. The older I get the more I believe there is only one true mistake you can make in life: Taking ^it^ too seriously. Laughter really is the best medicine.
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. ~Anonymous
Mark - I'm glad you found a good therapist. I have one that I also depend a great deal on also.
Hopefully, this will start to open up. And maybe you can get out and have some fun. I do wish the local Starbucks will open up their indoor seating area.
thanks so much guys! you are wonderful!
My therapist is also away for awhile but I am doing okay and like you, feel it’s good stuff for a therapist to get time away!
I think it’s alright to admit feeling some feelings when you say you feel like your siblings live lives you feel you do not. If I were to admit something to my therapist. she would ask me to explain things further and I’d have to dig deep to explain more. I’m sure many of us feel that way to some degree. This mental illness stuff causes us to beat ourselves up more than we ought to, methinks.
Peace to you mark!
thanks Sensitive!