Still the same really...
Low. Down. Fed up. Just can't seem to get a grip on life. It feels like I'm at the bottom and that is exactly where I will stay. I feel like there is no way back up. My social anxiety is bad and to be honest I just don't like being around people. Everyone is so bitchy and back stabbing and in reality only out there for themselves. It may seem like a really harsh thing to say but it is genuinely all I have experienced. It doesn't matter how nice or caring someone is it will always come back to the same thing. They slag people off, talk about them behind their backs and gossip away all the time. I hate it. I feel really alone and it just seems like it is something that will never change.
I'm also really struggling with getting a job and or going to college. I am enrolled for college starting on August 21st and I am not prepared and just don't know if I am capable of it. I don't know anything any more. I don't feel capable of a job either. I don't feel like I can do it with my social anxiety and having been a stay at home mum for 13 years. I tried to talk to my partner about it but he just said I am lazy and don't want a job and thats not the case at all :(
I just don't know where to turn to at all.
Replies
Start with one step in front of the other. I hear your struggle. New things often cause fear or anxiety. Maybe what you really need is a licensed clinical therapist or assessment with a good psychiatrist? Figure out if something else is going on that could be helped.
So if you want to just stay in the house for the rest of your life, what can you do to make money in the house? If your partner loses his job, or has health issues, or leaves, how would you create income? This whole idea may intimidate you or scare you. I remember when I was learning to reinvent myself from just stay at home mother to something new. And then from married to divorced, and then from working to being disabled. It is a journey and it sounds like you need help locally. I'm rooting for you.