STILL STRUGGLING
I AM STILL STRUGGLING TO OVERCOME THIS DEEP SADNESS AND THE SENSE OF DOOM. I FEEL CUT OFF FROM THE WORLD BY AN INVISIBLE BARRIER. MAYBE THAT BARRIER NEEDS TO BE THERE UNTIL I CAN HEAL MYSELF. I FEEL LIKE A NEED A CORNER TO HIDE IN BUT FIND MYSELF IN A ROUND ROOM!!!
I SEE THE PDOC ON TUESDAY. I CAN'T FORSEE HIM CHANGING MY MEDS OR EVEN ADDING ANY RIGHT NOW. AT THE PRESENT TIME, I TAKE; 300MG SEROQUEL, 750MG EPIVAL, LAMICTAL, ZOPICLONE PLUS A WATER PILL AND LIPITOR. I REALLY DON'T WANT ANY SWITCHING BECAUSE MOST OF THE TIME I AM STABLE AND CAN HANDLE SMALL STRESSORS. BUT WHEN I HAVE A BIG BANG LIKE THIS I JUST HAVE TO RIDE IT OUT. I JUST PRAY THAT THE TRIP IS NOT TOO LONG.
I TRIED TO SLEEP IN THIS MORNING BUT THE DAMN PHONE KEPT RINGING AND WAKING ME UP.
I DID MANAGE TO GET OUT TODAY. I REALLY FORCED MYSELF BUT I NEED TO DO IT OR I WILL GET CAUGHT UP IN THE TRAP OF KEEPING TO MYSELF FOR TOO LONG. I ONLY DID A FEW THINGS AND I GAVE MYSELF PERMISSION TO COME HOME AT ANY POINT WITHOUT GUILT. I GOT EVERYTHING DONE EXCEPT ONE SO I FEEL THAT THAT WAS AN ACCOMPLISHMENT.
I WAS GOING TO MAKE BRAN MUFFINS TODAY AND I HAVE EVERYTHING ON THE COUNTER TO DO IT BUT.....NOW I DON'T HAVE THE ENERGY OR INCLINATION. MADE LATER OR TOMORROW OR NOT!!
ANYWAY, THANKS GUYS FOR YOUR SUPPORT AND PRAYERS. IT IS REALLY NICE TO HAVE YOU WITH ME TO ENCOURAGE ME TO GET WELL.
DEBBIE
I SEE THE PDOC ON TUESDAY. I CAN'T FORSEE HIM CHANGING MY MEDS OR EVEN ADDING ANY RIGHT NOW. AT THE PRESENT TIME, I TAKE; 300MG SEROQUEL, 750MG EPIVAL, LAMICTAL, ZOPICLONE PLUS A WATER PILL AND LIPITOR. I REALLY DON'T WANT ANY SWITCHING BECAUSE MOST OF THE TIME I AM STABLE AND CAN HANDLE SMALL STRESSORS. BUT WHEN I HAVE A BIG BANG LIKE THIS I JUST HAVE TO RIDE IT OUT. I JUST PRAY THAT THE TRIP IS NOT TOO LONG.
I TRIED TO SLEEP IN THIS MORNING BUT THE DAMN PHONE KEPT RINGING AND WAKING ME UP.
I DID MANAGE TO GET OUT TODAY. I REALLY FORCED MYSELF BUT I NEED TO DO IT OR I WILL GET CAUGHT UP IN THE TRAP OF KEEPING TO MYSELF FOR TOO LONG. I ONLY DID A FEW THINGS AND I GAVE MYSELF PERMISSION TO COME HOME AT ANY POINT WITHOUT GUILT. I GOT EVERYTHING DONE EXCEPT ONE SO I FEEL THAT THAT WAS AN ACCOMPLISHMENT.
I WAS GOING TO MAKE BRAN MUFFINS TODAY AND I HAVE EVERYTHING ON THE COUNTER TO DO IT BUT.....NOW I DON'T HAVE THE ENERGY OR INCLINATION. MADE LATER OR TOMORROW OR NOT!!
ANYWAY, THANKS GUYS FOR YOUR SUPPORT AND PRAYERS. IT IS REALLY NICE TO HAVE YOU WITH ME TO ENCOURAGE ME TO GET WELL.
DEBBIE
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