Still not doing so good.

It's been a month since I wrote that last journal. I thought that maybe if I see how I am in the next month, I could see if I improved. Nothing has really improved and had probably gotten worse.
I had an annoying breakup with my ex boyfriend and now I currently have a new boyfriend. My ex was harassing my current bf because he thinks I got stolen from him. It's just that my ex didn't care how I felt and treated me worse than people he barely knew. I felt alone all the time and even more depressed, so I just had to leave.
I'm currently still looking for a job. I don't want to hope for too much, because I hate getting majorly disappointed all the time. I used to be a very hopeful person about everything. But, not everything is meant to work out and I'm just tired of being disappointed about everything. So, if there's little to no hope, then there's little to no disappointment.
I'm in alot of pain all the time and I know that's where most of my depression is coming from. There was a point last month where my leg pain was completely gone for a few days. I felt alot less depressed and alot happier with everything. I didn't change my diet and I didn't change anything else. I don't know what happened, but I hope it happens again.
I've been right on the edge with my depression. I've just wanted to give up. I've been like this for so long, I feel like nothing's ever gonna change. I just want to go curl up somewhere and sleep for a long time .