Still Lonely

I'm still feeling so lonely!! It just makes no sense to me. Why be married, if you cant even stand me enough to talk to me!! I would love to scream this to my husband but he probably wouldn't even hear me. I thought about trying to meet more people and become more social, but there is a little catch to that, apparently I have horrible social anxiety and when my own spouse cant even bother to talk to me, it really does a number for my confidence!! But I have to get over this lack of confidence because I know I'm interesting. Or I used to be, back when I had more friends!! I've got to find a way to get back on track!!