Sometimes outta sorts got to get myself back
went to service just now and it was a rough transition. My head felt like cement. I tried to lift my sights taking a little energy giving a little energy within and around me to sustain holding my head up out of my hands -I have to tell you I feel like an alien in there (church) or like the experience is alien to me. I know it’s what I am ‘supposed to like’ and then I started to drift off and thought about Blue and boy did my passion and joy for life returned.
Initially it was as if my head was a block of cement and my nose and eyes were flooding but Blue made hope and enjoyment return and the spirit lifted me up.
Dad has talked about when there’s a day with hope it makes for a joyous day.
I suppose I don’t know or understand what the praying is about. My mind has a blockage.sometimes and im trying to open my eyes to things. I guess what I can say is sometimes it's not 100% for me.
I suppose every day is different.
What am I not seeing? It feels like the ceremony today was about death.
I think the reminder to be self responsible emotionally now is giving me a sense of restoring peace
And context.
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Big hug Marky
I say a couple of known prayers and then I just talk to God
I think it can seem unnatural at times but I remind myself that's where faith comes into play
It may have been about death
That's something on people's mind now with the Pope just passing even if you aren't Catholic
Restoring peace sounds lovely...xo
Thanks Janet!
the theory which popped into my head on what you are not seeing stems from the old gypsy lore that so many humans feel like aliens because we ARE aliens. however much we love this amazing world, heaven is our home. we're only passing through. the self doubts begin when we mistake this world for our final destination
my own prayer is a running dialog with god. it's a come-as-you-are meetup. god embraces me in whatever state i am in. it royally pisses me off when my anger inspires god to go running for a massive closet of historical warrior costumes titillating, "which fight style shall we use today." bitch. . . don't you dare make me laugh when i'm pissed! ! ! the sumo costumes get me every time.
the ritual prayer i learn from dogmatic sources is my bid to commune with other humans.
now i have randy newman stuck in my head. thank you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lAJZraoTRO4
Thanks Arfie!!