So unsure

I just don't really know how much Tony cares about his own recovery.  He says it's #1 on his list, but he doesn't log onto DS as much anymore.  He doesn't care to do a lot of the little things he was (things he had on a list, etc.).  I think it's all slipping away just like I knew it would.  I'm really tired of trying to be + about things when it just ends up being a - situation. Maybe I'm just cranky 'cuz the meds don't feel right & the "monthly visitor" came this AM.  But I still feel like I'm doing the brunt of everything around here.  I know he's trying to find a job, but he doesn't seem to take my suggestions seriously.  He's always into only himself & rarely ever gives anyone else a true listen or care although he gives it tons of lip service. I'm trying so hard to continue to do the things that make me proud, like reading daily, setting goals to complete each day, etc.  And I'm trying to fix the things I'm not so good at... I'm trying to be more affectionate, more patient, less judgmental, more empathetic, less pessimistic, less prideful, etc.  But I find I'm not doing so well.  And I just don't know what I should do.