So pissed

My husband started the day today explaining how non affectionate I am and how I just push him away. He says it's nothing that I've said it's in my behaviour and how I avoid him. I don't avoid him. He spends his time in the garage.  He's a garage person. I enjoy being in my calm atmosphere. I read I write I watch tv I listen to music and I hang out with the kids. My oldest is usually in his room playing video games. I don't like it when he points out how introverted I am.  I don't like the couple he wants us to hang out with continuously. He has a history with them. I feel like the third wheel.  I don't like her and I think the feeling on her end is mutual. I don't trust her. I think she's shifty and manipulative.  We had a falling out a little while ago and my husband sided with her. I won't forgive him for that. If I fucked up I own it. But I'm done changing sides to make people happy. Agree to disagree...that's the stupidest thing I have ever heard.  If you do not agree with something you do not ever have to agree to disagree. Respect your values and hold true to yourself. If you continuously agree to disagree you lose pieces of you that you will never get back. Your beliefs define you and you should never be made to feel stupid or guilty for something that you were not aware of. A situation that I was never told about prior to my actions caused a mental fucking flip out of epic proportions. Get the fuck over yourself.  If I fuck up I'll be the first to own it. THAT particular situation was uncalled for and it was unfair to be ganged up on by my husband and his friend. Her husband sided with them and apologised to me. Don't apologize to me because your wife is fucked. I have no use for either of them and as much as my husband hates drama he feeds into a lot of theirs. Hes so fucking fake when he's down there. It's disgusting to watch. It's no surprise there's no one here I can relate to. They've all lived here gone to school with the same people know everyone's story and I'm an outsider. Why bother trying? They're set in their ways small minds with a small community. Can't think outside of the fucking box. I'm done trying to fit in and I'm done being made to feel guilty about everything.  Everything is always my fault. Im sitting here journalling right now and if he wasn't crashed out because of oding on MY fucking meds he'd be out in the garage bitching about how I wasn't out there with him. I have no interest in anything at all in his garage. I don't work with tools. I'm not a mechanic. If he wants to see me he knows where to find me. Fuck him.