Slowly getting rid of Smokey's things - interesting.

I am slowly getting rid of Smokey's camping equipment and tools.  I thought it would be a lot harder than it was for me.  These were the things that Smokey loved the most in material possessions.  Smokey did not love possessions but he did love me.  I gave my daughter Lisa all his camping equipment and some tools.  My brother Don and his friend Blair took the rest of the tools.  Lisa got the best tools that is for sure.  I didn't mind giving stuff to Blair as he was helpful for me fixing a few things in the apartment after Smokey died.  I am afraid of heights and he put new bulbs in my kitchen light fixture.  He figured out how to take out nails and things in places they should not be.  Since Smokey died without a will, I am still waiting to get the Letters of Administration from the lawyer.  She is waiting to appear before a judge.  It all sucks if you ask me.  Not only did you lose the love of your life but you have to deal with all the stupid paperwork after death.  You are mourning and grieving the loss but you still have to do the paperwork.  It is easier if your loved one had a will.  Alas!  It was not my case. 
You know Smokey did accept me just for myself lock, stock and barrel.  I hope the next guy accepts me the same way.  These kind of men are hard to find.  They are the rarity that is for sure.  I have a list of nine men I don't want for myself.  There are so many creeps out in this big wide beautiful world that is for sure.  How do women my age (54 years old or young depending on how you look at it) find a guy?  I am not pushing it either.  I just go out with my friend, my brother or my daughter.  When things are meant to be, it will just happen. 
I just need a part-time job now.  This also seems to be elusive as well.  It is bad economic times.  It is the employers market that is for sure. 
I am sure things will settle down in the end.  I hope I don't get screwed in the process of living life.  I put my faith, belief and trust in God.  He will work it all out.  You don't have to agree but that is where I am at the moment.  Without my faith, I would just fall apart cause I can't handle it all.  It is too much for me.
Diane