simple yet complicated

I'm sick of this ugly feeling that comes back all the time. I went out with my mom yesterday n we we'ree in the old neighborhood and I think I'm shell shocked. I mean I get these flashback feelings of fear. I was looking down the street where I used to live n was remembering.

I just need to meet new ppl but I feel so different somehow. I am starting to get back to normal but I'm not there yet. Just hate all the lies he told me. It still swirls in my head sometimes n then I feel whimsical then it turns to fear. I think I'm just gonna play pool all the time. Just play n play n play.