Should I become a Therapist
I retired from the military and now I have no direction in life. I have a job but it is just a job for money, no real career. So I'm thinking that I need a focus in my life. Something to work towards. I have a BA and an MBA so it should be easy to get admitted to a graduate school. I have done what amounts to therapy for my sailors for years and years so I know what I am getting myself into. I would be a non-traditional student starting a master's program at 52.
I just wonder if they take students that are in therapy themselves and have seen the inside repeatedly of a psych ward. I would think it gives me experience but is this experience exclusionary?
Looking at Northwestern Univ. I have an advanced certificate from Kellogg (the Master's business school there). I liked Kellogg a great deal and they have a good name.
So what do you think?
Replies
I think it is a very virtuous notion. I would confer with a University counselor ... and then if all is well, go for it.
I just had a completely silly thought. Those that can do and those that can't teach.
I am a fantastic "therapist" if you give me a problem I can solve it in two minutes flat. I have all this information and all these skills. But I can't seem to heal myself at all....lol
I think though in all seriousness, that the best therapists are the ones who have been through things. I think that in order to have caring, compassion, understanding, empathy, knowledge that you would have had to have been there yourself.
If you feel as though it is something that you would love to do. Something that would give you focus and fulfilment. Then go for it.
I can't see how your past would harm you chances of getting into school. I would think it would be an asset. And going back to school when you are older is usually a positive thing.
I think it would be wonderful Thor.... You have so much understanding from both sides.... I think it really depends on IF you truly feel ready to help others and are able to compartmentalize at this point
I don't think that there's anything wrong with someone in therapy being a therapist.... My concern for you is that not too long ago you were feeling suicidal
If you think that you're feeling really stable have at it.... I agree with WV maybe have a meeting with both your doc and your school counsellor
You are a kind and thoughtful soul and I think you would be really a good therapist if or when you're ready..... Big hug.....xo
As someone who's lived this scenario I can give you my 2 cents. Like you I have multiple Degrees, 2 Bachelors in Computer Science and Accounting and a Ph.d in Clinical Psychology. I started University when I was 16 and spent 12 years obtaining that Education. But going in I knew I wanted to be a Psychologist, I also knew I have a crapass body medically and my BiPolar when DX'd at 20 was not stable....I knew I wouldn't be able to practice for the length of life I wanted to, thus the 2 fallback careers....my OCD and the Manic half live in my brain, like 2 little robots calling the shots....I knew I had to work, had to keep my brain busy, I also knew that everything required massive amounts of lists, organization, planning and reorganization and more planning. I did not tolerate change or indecisiveness well.
Question 1: Can a Therapist be in Therapy...absolutely, most of them are.
Question 2: Could you get into a Ph.D program at Northwestern? With your current Degrees and Professional Experience and intelligence, If for some weird reason they didn't take you, there are tons of other good Uni's that would.
but....
Its not just about having the intelligence to be able to get into school and get the Degree. Before you can help other people with their problems, you have to be able to help yourself with yours. All of the coping skills and therapeutic styles you'll learn, all of the tips and tricks you'll learn to get people to open up to you and trust you, the ways you'll learn to help them unlock the dark and scary things in their brain, study them, mold them, work through them, week out the dark and scary parts, then put the rest back as just memories that are part of a past that does not haunt them anymore. All those things you learn....You have to believe they truly work, and for that to happen you have to implement them within yourself and deal with your demons.
Because if you can't use the tools and techniques that you're trying to teach someone else....they won't be able to learn them.
A big part of making yourself the strongest, most whole, stable person you can be is being able to accept all aspects of this particular job....and I can tell you from experience that it's not easy. Therapist work day in and out trying to help depressed, scared, confused and broken people....they spend their days helping them put themselves back together so that they can function out in the real world. But Therapists are not God and they do not have magic powers, unfortunately, and not all patients have the will or understanding of how to make the darkness leave and let themselves be put back together. And those people, those patients of your are the ones who kill themselves.
Its not a piece of the job that you can take out and not deal with. And I can tell you from experience you think you're good enough, you think you've got it all under control....you're helping people and you know that's what you were meant to do. Until that first phone call and that first patient...the one who shook your hand and smiled at you a few hours earlier and told you how much he appreciated your help because he was finally feeling better and smiled and walked out your door, with a casual "see ya next time Doc" .... then gets in his car, swallows a handful of Xanax drives to his father's house and slams his car full speed head on into the huge old Live Oak in the front yard.
The first patient I lost was an 18 year old kid who decided not only did he need to die he needed to punish his father for not loving him enough, so he killed himself where that man would never be able to forget it.
After 1 year in my bright shiny new Career of helping people, doing what I knew I was meant to do, it was pretty damn close to being the end of my career, because it took me a hell of a long time to understand that just because I chose to specialize in area's that I'd personally dealt with most of my life, areas that I'd battled and gotten under control and stabilized for long periods of time. I realized 2 things very fast. 1. I had now surrounded myself with Triggers for massive Depressive Episodes and 2. I never thought about patients dieing, because I knew with all my personal experience, intelligence, training and education that I could "fix" them.
Hell I'd survived parents consisting of a Pedophile and a Psychopath, I made it through University at 16 on my own, with BiPolar Disorder and a host of other medical crap, I made it being married at 19 and having a child at 21 who was constantly in the hospital from the day he was born and who kept constantly trying to to die on my. I made it having to take my crackhead sisters kids in most of their life for 4 years, because she was to high or to busy prostituting to remember where she left them, or feed them.
So I'd done all the hard stuff, teaching people how to deal with and manage their problems was the easy part, never considered that some people just can't be fixed or helped. That first death stripped me of my confidence (which I realized was arrogance), my faith in my ability to help anyone and my courage to even try. It took me 6 months give or take before I could go back and do Group Therapies, another 5 or 6 months before I could treat a patient 1 on 1 and a hell of a lot longer than that to not be terrified that I was going to kill everyone I had.
I practiced for 10 years and then had to stop for medical health reasons, in that time I lost 6 patients. And the feeling that it was my fault, that I'd failed them, was the same every time. Logically I knew if wasn't and I hadn't, I was very good at what I did and I loved it, but each time it took my brain and my heart a few months to reconcile Logic and Fear of Loss of Ability.
So, yeah, logistically, statistically you would probably be able to get into a Program and get a Degree. There are Psych Studies you have to take, residency to go through, Licensing...all that stuff.
But if this is something you really think you want to do, something your called or meant to do.....you have to be right with you and have your issues managed and you have to go into it knowing that you can't help everyone and people do die on your watch. And that's not something everyone can do.
There are other ways to help people, which might give you a taste to see if this is really for you. I still volunteer with a couple groups and I work a Suicide Hotline. You could check out your County Health Office or Social Services or VA and see about volunteering with groups of whichever Mental Illness subset you're interested in.
If you need a focus in life why not! I wanted to, but some of the things like rape and child abuse i can't deal with.
Thank you all for your replies. You have given me a great deal to consider. I know that I am broken and am being put back together and this program would be about three years long so I have time to become more stable. My guilt and shame of my PTSD is something that is not going to leave so I am going to make peace with it and try to move on. There is a couple of combat PTSD events that I need to deal with also, but I see it that I have time. Luckily my bipolar has been stable. I think that is a result of electro-convulsive therapy. I am a bit scared now that I am only doing ECT once a month now. I can really feel when I need an ECT treatment.
I called NW today and got a bunch of info from a salesman. Lot to ponder. Will keep everyone informed.
Just remember Thor that Jesus chose the broken to help him. Keep your chin up and if you need a friend message me. :0) Keep healing.
Thanks. That is my thinking also the broken have a unique perspective on mental health. I can speak from experience on many topics.
:o)
Thor, therapists are often called the wounded warriors for a reason. You will deal with many with other than bi-polar, but you will learn more during the education and onsite training period. Follow your heart. Hugs.