Sensible and making a plan
I think I have been living in a dream. A dream of following or gliding along in my spirit and not feeling the outerlayer of structure in my life. I feel like I have been living in a bubble, of how I would like to see the world. I have been indulging my whims too.
For whatever reason, today I saw the world as I am. I know my family loves me, but I need more than family love to engage in life.
I have a few friendships - which I mostly communicate to over the internet.
Today I am realizing, I need to eat sensibly - I need to eat proper meals otherwise I will get moody. I can't drink alcohol without expecting to be moody for a couple of days after there. I realize I can love my siblings and my parents but can't expect them to be my life.
I am sitting here in my room, and I am realizing I need to make some plans for myself, be sensible and not so passive about just accepting what life sends my way. I can't live on shards of texts and emails, or Dr's calls. I need more.