Scared

My calm that I experienced right after the hospital didn't last a day.  I'm back to panicking several times a day.  Don't feel I can sleep and yet, when I do sleep, I don't want to wake up.  Sometimes I think it would be better for everyone if I didn't wake up. 
 
Anyways, did something that I may regret.  I contacted an old friend on facebook whom I haven't seen in years.  I don't know if she even remembers me.  What happens if she doesn't remember me?