saw a therapist... unsure if I will continue

I saw a therapist yesterday. I am unsure if I will continue. We agreed to three

meetings and then to assess after that. I think that sounds like a wise plan.

The day before I saw the therapist, my mind, which pushes me to question and seek out solutions,

did a total brainfart in an attempt to control myself when I sensed I was going to do something inappropriate

and unfair. I didn't want to get into trouble, so my mind latched on to a self control type of thing.

OK that said, and probably totally weird to read, I have been struggling to deal with myself since.

Maybe it will work it's way out... I think it affected so many relationships since then - that I just need to keep

going and not worry about the details of things... I can keep working hard at work, I can come home

and go to yoga. After therapy I kind of became this sloth and I need to keep pushing myself to think

about what I am doing and of ways to keep busy. I don't know. I have a mind that won't let me have peace

and once I find a kind of peace... I know I do want to go for a long walk tomorrow. I want sweets too - but that's not good for me.

I am not trying to beat myself up - but I do hope for motivation. I hope you guys are having a good day.
peace and smoked salmon,

Mark