Saturday Morning
Hi SOTH - It is a beautiful Saturday Morning which happens to be my toughest time. I talked to my mom every day but Saturday morning we would talk longer and "try to change the world". I would meet my daughter and grandson on Saturdays for lunch and get caught up...Oh how I miss that!!! When you work all week, Saturday was always such a welcome day but I find myself so sad on Saturday's missing my daughter and mom sooo much. So, I come to this site to write knowing once again you are out there with hugs and an understanding heart.
I'm now getting my daughter's mail - I find myself not picking up my mail everyday somehow thinking that if I don't pick it up, I don't have see the yellow sticker on the envelope which just reminds me that my daughter is gone. Such little things that are so hard to deal with sometimes. REALITY.....Ugh...
Could someone tell me what the week-end in Tahoe might be like or what has the past times have been like? Thank you.
Have a great day - much love.... Vicki
I'm now getting my daughter's mail - I find myself not picking up my mail everyday somehow thinking that if I don't pick it up, I don't have see the yellow sticker on the envelope which just reminds me that my daughter is gone. Such little things that are so hard to deal with sometimes. REALITY.....Ugh...
Could someone tell me what the week-end in Tahoe might be like or what has the past times have been like? Thank you.
Have a great day - much love.... Vicki
Replies
Hi Vicki,
I used to talk to my mom and dad on Saturday mornings too. It was hard when she passed away. Neither my dad or myself could do Saturdays anymore. (Just like you said the little things.) We changed to Tuesdays and Fridays. Now that he is married it is sort of like - \"Whenever!\" I am so glad he is happy and love his new wife.
I have never gone to the retreat so I know the moms have a time of reunion and real hugs versus cyber hugs. :) I am trying to remember how to get you to the information so I will return.
Much love,
Leda
Okay, go to http://www.dailystrength.org/groups/formomsonly and find the \"News\" at the top middle part of the page. It will say more about the retreat this year and last year so hope that gives you some of the information you need. Otherwise soon, someone who has attended a retreat will be along and will tell you all about the activities.
I hope that helps a bit,
Leda
Like Leda, I have not gone to a retreat. Somehow, I just don\'t think I am ready to share my grief, in person and in public. Just me...Some of the moms love to go and do so every year.
I miss my phone calls, with my son so much. We could say anything to each other and did, lol. I hope you had a peaceful Saturday...
((((HUGS))))...Julia
AFTER MY DAUGHTER DIED, I MISSED HER PHENE CALLS THE MOST WE WOULD TALK TO EACH OTHER EVERY DAY. I MISS THOSE PHONE CALLLS SO MUCH. AND ALSO AFTER ROZ.PASSED I HAD TO CHANGE HER ADDRESS TO OURS AND WHEN HER BILLS AND LETTERS CAME I WOULD JUST BREAK DOWN IT WAS LIKE SO UNBELIEABLE TO ME SHE IS GONE. I STILL AFTER 10 YEARS GET MAIL FOR HER AND I STILL CRY. WE NEVER FORGET OUR CHILDREN. TAHOE IS BEAUTIFUL I ONLY LIVE 200 MILES FROM THERE I LIVE IN CALIFORNIA BUT IT IS BEAUTIFUL. I HAVE NEVER BEEN ON A RETREAT AND WHAT IS WEIRD THE FIRST DAY OF THE NEW RETREAT IS MY DAUGHTERS BIRTHDAY 8/8/1961. I HOPE YOU GET THAT INSURANCE FIXED SUCKS, BLESS YOUR ANGEL HUGS MARY ANN
Hi Vicki...my son died on 11/22/08 and it was a Saturday. I work all week as well, but Tuesday and Wednesday are my days off. I just want to share something that was said to me very early on and I have always remembered and kept dear to my heart. That was that I would not miss my son on a \"special\" day any more than I would any other day of the year. What really brought this home to me was that my son died on the Saturday before Thanksgiving, but in 2012, his death date fell on Thanksgiving! Which one was I supposed to feel worse on? The Saturday before or Thanksgiving day? So, for me, they are just numbers and days on a calendar. I choose to work my regular scheduled days, whether they fall on Michael\'s B/D, death day or my B/D. I miss Michael every day, no more or no less on any other day. Just my way of dealing with it. As for retreat, I went for the first time in 2009, just 8 months after my son died. It was Niagara Falls. I have been to every one since and hope to make it to Tahoe. It would take pages to tell you how wonderful an experience it is. I suggest you go to the home group page and look at past retreats. For me, my first retreat was the very first time that I truly laughed without guilt and felt understood. I remember my mom asking me how could I go be with all these women who had lost kids, how depressing that would be for her. But it is not like that at all! We walk through life now with people asking us \"How are you coping?\" and do not really care what the answer is, so we put on a mask and say \"I am doing okay\". At retreat, no one is going to ask you how you are doing...We KNOW how you are doing. And that damn mask can be left at home...Not needed at retreat! Hugs are real. Smiles are real. Love is real. Understanding is real. We laugh, we cry, we eat, we drink, we bond, we form forever friendships. We are even so human that not everything goes perfectly at times and people get their noses out of joint over little things. I hope if it feels right for you to come to Tahoe, that you will join us!
Peace. Belinda
I\'m so sorry for what you feel on Saturdays. My son was getting tons of college brochures before he died and I know that some of them are still coming in, but I think that my husband (who is retired) gets the mail before I get home from work and sanitizes it to prevent further heartbreak. I know that when I get something addressed to Jackson, it\'s so, so hard.
I\'ve never been to a retreat before since my loss is new this year also. But, I am planning on attending. I am fortunate and will be in driving distance, which makes it easier. But, Tahoe is a gorgeous location and I know that just being around other moms who know what it\'s like to lose a child is comforting to me. It\'s such a unique loss and I just need to be around people who have some sense of what I\'m going through. I hope to see you there!
Laura
If you can join us in Tahoe,,, please do,,,,, there are plenty of hugs, tears, laughter,,, it is hard the first retreat ,, getting to meet everyone,,, tis scary but also a joy... please joy us.. love ya!
Check out our website....
ForMomsOnly.org
There you will see a tab at the top of the page that says PAST RETREATS. You can read brief descriptions of the retreats we\'ve has thus far. I\'ve been blessed to be at every retreat we\'ve had so far and hope I never have to miss one! They are magical!!! YES, the first one you attend, like anything else, is a bit nerve racking because you don\'t \"know\" anyone and it\'s all new and you\'re not sure what to expect. But let me tell you, you will never feel so much LOVE energy as you will once the nerves settle down and the hugs start flowing!!
We cry, for sure, but we LAUGH just as much...no, MORE. It\'s truly amazing just how much FUN we have while sharing our kids, our stories, our heartache. Doesn\'t seem to make much sense, but it\'s the truth. I\'ve laughed till I nearly peed my pants, and I\'ve cried til snot covered my shirt. I\'ve learned and grown and done things I never thought I\'d do....such as, going on a hot air balloon! (our retreat in Park City, UT)
Each year is different, but each year is a GIFT! I hope to see you in August in Tahoe!! Information will be posted soon by the retreat committee, so keep an eye out for that.....both on our group page here and on our own website listed above.
LOVE YOU!