Rough day , rough night ...
I don't know why and don't care why but I just cannot "do" this grief anymore. I am tired of the nightmares and tired of the pain the longing for my only child and just don't understand why life had to kick me (all of us) in the teeth.
It is just wrong!
I miss you Ed! I love you! This is almost unbearable but bear it I must!
I love you forever and always, mom. xoxo
God, if you will please give me a sign or visit from Ed? Give me the strength to allow this pain to wash over me and become gentler again. Let tomorrow be better. In Jesus name, amen.
It is just wrong!
I miss you Ed! I love you! This is almost unbearable but bear it I must!
I love you forever and always, mom. xoxo
God, if you will please give me a sign or visit from Ed? Give me the strength to allow this pain to wash over me and become gentler again. Let tomorrow be better. In Jesus name, amen.
Replies
Oh Linda I am sorry that the grief is so powerful right now...it just stinks! I hope that tomorrow is more gentle...love you
Wouldn\'t it be a help if the grief was like a big heavy coat that you could shed when it just became to much to bear?
Those times when grief comes barreling back in, all guns blazing, are so very painful. I\'m sorry this is one of those times for you, sweetest Linda. It IS wrong, oh so wrong, that anyone should endure the pain that we do.
We\'re right here by your side as you catch your breath and regain a stronger sense of peace and comfort.
Sending much love for a gentle tomorrow ~ with a big shout out to precious Ed ~ Debbie
Some times I can\'t breath and I think that is what is happening to you~We all understand and we all ask why~ There is just no answer...I guess we have no choice, but to handle it~ I am so sorry..I pray tomorrow will be a little easier~~Big hug ~!!
I\'m so sorry to hear that grief has overwhelmed you. I know how that can happen. In fact I never really recovered from the death of my father, it seems as though it permanently unhitched me from things somehow.
He wasn\'t the greatest person in the world, but we had lived together through good times and bad for so many years. We stood by each other when it seemed like the world was against us. When I lost him, I lost my anchor and now I drift through life.
So I know how it feels to have your ability to live taken away. You hang on, Linda. The world needs people like you...you have a good heart and there just aren\'t many people around that have your kind of heart.
You always came by and commented on my journal when I really needed it. And I know you\'ve done that for others too. So pull yourself together, my friend...we need you.
hugging u tight....i am also missing cody so much its driving me crazy....i just want you to know im walkin beside ya.....you r not alone...luv u
~hang in there~
Oh Linda, I am so sorry this is a rough time for you and I do hope our prayers are answered for a gentler day tomorrow.
Sending love and prayers your way for you, Ken and Ed (please send a sign),
Leda
You can get through this and you will, have faith. We are all with you and there are so many inspirational stories of women who have rebuilt their lives. Take it an hour at a time, you will. Ever know why, but we can\'t turn back time. Your beautiful Ed ia all around, talk to him often and remember all the precious memories. This is so unfair and as you say almost unbearable but our loved ones never really leave us. Be gentle on yourself, you will never get over it but you can learn to live more peacefully with your grief. Sending you so much love today. Xxxx
Yes, it is just plain wrong that the good die young - or before their Moms do. \"Doing Grief\" to me, is all about \"enduring.\" What else can we do?! Patient endurance is a job in itself! No wonder Bereaved Moms get tired--it\'s not an easy job to \"patiently endure\" and we\'re all allowed to be frail humans every now and then! Good things are the hardest to wait for...
I think anyone in a serving others profession has it even more difficult -with needing to attend to the needs of others when what we feel like is a turtle wanting to withdraw into our shell sometimes. Tightest of Heart Hugs to you Linda and hoping that soon, your heart will feel a little lighter, dear one ...Donna
It is SO wrong and SO unfair... Deepest of sighs... I am here for YOU dear Linda as each of us are and this is the swaying of the pendulum of grief that just goes back and forth and back and forth. It can be exhausting and so very painful. I understand and don\'t know how any of us are still standing yet somehow we are.
Nurturing and loving care for that beautiful heart of yours and may Spirit surround you... Ed, please let your mom know as only you can that you are near. She needs your loving presence by her side.
Stay close dear one and my prayers are with YOU.
Love YOU and always your beloved son, Ed. May today be a gentler one and if not you know how to ride this wild wave of grief, sorrow and finding respite in hope once again. I have come to discover that it\'s the cycle of our lives now. What goes down must come up and you will too Linda when you are ready to. Sometimes darkness is needed for our growth as well.
Loving care dear heart and I\'m with you...
XO Joanie
I have those same feelings...I guess we all do,,,,so many days I feel the green eyes nasty jealous monster inside,,and I think \'why me\' \'not fair\' I love my Morgan, you love your Ed..we are good moms,,,why,,why,,why, remeber Linda,,,you are not alone,,,,you are so loved....
Linda, this may sound unfeeling but possibly you are hitting your grief bottom...and now is the time to figure out how to start \'going on \' ...
I know my bottom came when I was dealing with a bottle and realized this could not continue...and no, I am not an alcoholic but was numbing myself... Jenn deserves a better Mom than what I was becoming and her memory deserved me to live the best I could...do I miss her..you bet your ass I do..do I wish she were her..again, YES..but I know in my heart that I can honor her better than I was..
Hugs dear SOTH...MaryLou
Talk about getting kicked in the teeth! Twice for me, first 12 yrs. ago with Jesse, and then in 2011 with my last and only child Justin. Life was really screwed up for me, that\'s for sure. All I can do is take medicine now and pray to God. I feel your pain and pray that God takes some of it for you.....XOX Debbie
Oh dear Linda, I hope that you are feeling better today and the pain of grief has softened somewhat. This yo-yo roller coaster effect can really take its toll at times. At those times when the pain of grief cuts so deep, I sink into my abyss, but somehow with everyone\'s support, I look up and see light in the darkness and start making my way out again. Seems hard to find that middle ground at times, doesn\'t it? We all love you and support you here. I pray that you will see more light in the days ahead. Sending you a big tight hug! Love, Diane
We all get those drastic feelings of longing for our children. Each day I know my thoughts we wonder why he is gone and \"if I could see him again\". I will never ever not have these thoughts each day but I try my best to keep active and think of what my son would want from me. Doing for others for me and my son makes me feel better. Sending heart felt hugs, Peggy